Page 58 of Due North
“I didn’t have my split gloves, so I was out without any, and Sundance’s reins were hard to hold onto when my hands got cold. I’ll take care of them at home.”
Heaven shook her head. “We’re going to go to the spare bathroom. We’ll clean them up, but if I don’t like what I see, we’re taking you to the clinic in the morning.”
Tobi’s shoulders sank, and she nodded. “I didn’t want to take the time to find my gloves, and I thought I would be fine, but I underestimated the windchill, and then—”
“Child,” Amity said, walking over to her and helping her off with her heavy barn coat. “We’re grateful to you for helping us get Poppy home safely tonight. You don’t have to make excuses. You’re part of the family here, and we take care of our own. I’ve raised five boys on a ranch, and I can see you have some healing to do. Don’t risk an infection out of stubbornness.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Tobi whispered.
“Good. Now, go with Heaven, and I’ll be down in a few minutes to take a look.”
Heaven winked at Amity and then led Tobi down the hallway. When they were out of sight, Amity turned to me. “She’s right, you know.”
My shoulders deflated, and I nodded, kissing Poppy’s head. “I know. I need to thank him for finding Poppy, but I haven’t seen him since he found her.”
“Last I heard, he was up on the ridge mending the hole in the fence where he found her. He’s probably back to his cabin by now.”
“But he didn’t come over and check on us.”
“Was that a question or a statement?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted. I didn’t know anything anymore when it came to Caleb North. Not the way I thought I did.
“Well, the answer is, he did come over and check on you. He didn’t want to get Poppy overexcited again when you were trying to get her to sleep, so he didn’t stay.”
“That sounds like Caleb,” I said with a sigh.
“He loves you, Cece, and he loves that little girl like his own. I think it’s time you admit that to yourself and stop trying to sabotage it.”
“That’s not what I’m doing!” I snarled, and she laughed at me.
Laughed at me!
As though she knew everything.
“Sweetheart, that’s exactly what you’re doing. You’re afraid you’re going to lose him, so you’d rather be the one to leave. Does that make it easier on your heart? Have you found relief knowing you don’t have to see him, kiss him, or be with him anymore?”
“No,” I said, my voice shaky now. “I’m afraid, Amity.”
“Of what? Love? Caleb hurting you? The boy wouldn’t know how to hurt you. He worships you.”
I bit my lip to keep it from trembling while I took her words to heart. “I’m afraid of losing all of you.”
Amity grabbed my hand immediately and held it to her heart. “Why on earth would you be afraid of losing all of us? We’re never leaving this ranch, baby.”
“But if Caleb and I don’t work out, then I’ll have to leave the ranch!” I exclaimed. The fear, pain, anger, and anxiety were too hard to hold in, and I started to quake. My reality was out in the room now. “Our bags are already packed.”
Amity knelt and encompassed us in her arms, her lips kissing Poppy’s temple and then mine. “Sweet girl, the only way you and Caleb won’t work out is because you let your fear keep you from being together. He’s so in love with you he would have died tonight for that baby just to make sure she was back in your arms.”
“What do you mean?” I asked desperately. “I still don’t know what happened up on that ridge.”
“Because we can’t explain it. Only Caleb can. Though, I don’t know if it’s explainable.” She rubbed Poppy’s back to calm her again, and then she wiped my tears with a napkin from the table. “My point is, stop wasting time on what might happen and concentrate on what you want to happen. Didn’t tonight teach you anything?”
I nodded, my chin trembling again as I gazed at my baby girl in my arms. “I suspect it taught me that and a whole lot more.” So much more I couldn’t stay here a second longer. “I need to see Caleb.”
Amity’s grin was wide when she ran for my coat.
Nineteen
