Page 105 of Perfect Happiness
“I’m sorry for lying.”
Mother tapped on the table with her long nails.
“Why didn’t you eat?”
Jiyoo hated curry rice as much as she hated cheese.
“My tummy hurt.”Jiyoo lied without thinking.
“Does it still hurt?”
Jiyoo was feeling more and more uneasy.Mother didn’t seem like she was asking out of concern.Even though her tone was gentle, it sounded insincere.
“A little.”
Mother nodded.And that was it.Jiyoo worked up the courage to ask another question.
“Can I stop eating?”
“Fine.”
Mother stuck another fry into her mouth.
“Did your father come home earlier today?”
For a moment Jiyoo didn’t know what Mother meant.Was she asking about her real father or stepfather?Once she remembered that this home was stepfather’s home, her chest suddenly became tight.If she answered honestly, she would have to mention Auntie Jane.And if she lied, that might get her into trouble in the future.If Stepfather told Mother the truth, that would ruin everything.
Don’t worry.Your stepfather will keep our secret.
This is what Auntie Jane said when she called Jiyoo after Stepfather drove off.But Jiyoo wasn’t sure if she could believe this.She didn’t know Stepfather very well—aside from the fact he didn’t smile or talk much.Jiyoo decided to trust Auntie Jane.If she said he would keep their secret, then he would keep their secret.
“I don’t know.I was napping all day because my stomach hurt.”
“He didn’t even call?”
Jiyoo thought for a while before finding the best answer.
“I didn’t hear the phone ring.”
Mother didn’t say anything.She didn’t even nod.All she did was chop a French fry into segments on the table with her long nails.Jiyoo hesitated for a moment before asking:
“Can I go to bed now?”
“Okay, go to bed.”
Mother’s eyes were fixed on Jiyoo’s unfinished cheeseburger, as if she was telling Jiyoo to sleep inside the cheeseburger.Mother did this often.Looking at one thing, while talking about another thing.This was a sign that she was irritated by what Jiyoo was doing.Even after being told to go to bed, Jiyoo found it hard to get up from her seat.
“What are you waiting for?”Mother asked as she lifted her gaze from the cheeseburger.Only then did Jiyoo get out of her seat.As she walked out into the living room, she could sense Mother’s gaze.She slowly went up the stairs, pretending like her stomach still hurt.She wanted to get to the top of the stairs in one giant leap, but she tried her best to resist this urge.Jiyoo wondered how nice it would be to have the power of transformation.Then she could turn into a small caterpillar and crawl up the stairs.That way she wouldn’t attract Mother’s attention.
But even when she got upstairs, she still wasn’t at ease.She felt like Noah was standing in front of his bedroom door glaring at her.She could almost hear him say, “Give me back my soccer ball!”Jiyoo put her hands over her ears, dropped her head, and hurried past Noah’s bedroom door toward the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth.She did the same thing when she came out of the bathroom.It was just a few steps from the bathroom to her room, but the whole time, two different urges were fighting each other.One was the urge to turn around and see if Noah was really there.And the other was the urge to run into her room.
Jiyoo did neither.She kept her eyes forward as she walked to her room.She wanted to lock the door, but she didn’t do this.Mother hated it when she did that.She became furious when she came to say goodnight to Jiyoo and found the door locked.She said it was no different than telling her to “Go away.”
Jiyoo turned off the light and crawled into bed.She turned on the nightlight sitting on the bedside table and lay flat on her back.Her eyes naturally drifted to the top of the wardrobe.That was where she hid Dad Puppet.Now, all she had to do was wait for her Stepfather to come home.When that happened Mother would go into the master bedroom, which would mean it was safe for Jiyoo to take Dad Puppet from his hiding spot and place him under her pillow.
Jiyoo started counting.One, two, three...Nine hundred ninety-nine.Still her stepfather hadn’t come back home.She counted to one thousand again.She counted to one thousand five times, but still her stepfather hadn’t come home.The house was quiet.There were no sounds of Mother moving.Jiyoo figured Mother must have gone to sleep.Did that mean it was safe?Mischievous Mouse said it did.
Jiyoo got down from the bed.She got up on her desk and took Dad Puppet down from the wardrobe.Then she got back into bed and placed the puppet under her pillow.Relief washed over her.Now she felt like she could finally relax and fall asleep.Jiyoo regretted not taking Dad Puppet with her when Mother came to take her from Grandma’s house.Had she taken him with her, she wouldn’t have needed to call Auntie Jane.
