Page 6 of Perfect Happiness
Are you sure?Jiyoo thought of the box of puppets in the attic and the day she discovered it.
The second floor had three doors: the bedroom door that faced the stairs, the door to the left which led to the bathroom, and the door to the right which had a lock on it, all connected by a long hallway.Whenever they stayed at the cabin, Jiyoo’s curiosity about what was behind the locked door became unbearable.And when she found the keys hidden in the drawer of the hallway dresser one day, she felt like she had dug up lost treasure; one of the three keys on the chain fit the lock to the attic perfectly.
Jiyoo didn’t hesitate before opening the door.She was immediately met with complete darkness.There wasn’t a single window.Jiyoo flipped the switch on the wall, but even with the lights on, the room wasn’t as bright as a normal room.Indeed, the only light in the room was a single dim lightbulb attached to the wall.The first thing that her eyes locked onto was the ceiling of the room, which matched the one in the second-floor bathroom.It followed the slope of the roof.
Stepping into the room, Jiyoo was struck by a musty smell.Stacked on the long, narrow wood floor were all kinds of objects.A rolled-up carpet that had been stood upright, a blanket wrapped in a plastic cover, a curtain stuffed in a plastic bag, old comic books, plastic baskets filled with unrecognizable junk, and an assortment of paper boxes.
And among all these objects was a box full of hand puppets.Overwhelmed by excitement, Jiyoo ran downstairs.She wanted to ask Mother if she could play with the hand puppets.
“Mother.”
Mother, who was chopping meat on the counter when Jiyoo called her, turned around.When her eyes met Jiyoo’s, she smiled.Jiyoo loved Mother’s smile.Or rather, she loved the moments when Mother smiled.Those moments when the corners of Mother’s eyes curled up as she beamed at Jiyoo with her beautifully straight teeth.Her sparkling eyes were asking,Yes, my daughter?
“Can I play in the attic?”
“The attic?You mean the storage room upstairs?”
“Yes, that one,” Jiyoo said, barely able to hold back her excitement.She had almost revealed the fact that she found the key.She had wanted to ask if she could play with the things in the attic.The puppets were one of the things in the attic.
Mother turned back to face the counter and threw down the cleaver she’d been holding.When she turned back to look at Jiyoo, the smile had disappeared from her face.Her lips had turned thin, her cheeks hollow, even the sparkle in her eyes had disappeared.So icy was her expression that Jiyoo felt like she shouldn’t breathe.Breathless, Jiyoo waited for Mother’s response.
“No, you may not.”
If Mother said no, that meant no.She had never changed her mind once she said no.In other words, there was no point in Jiyoo’s going downstairs, waking up her sleeping mother, and asking again if she could play with the puppets.It was enough that she had cried her eyes out that one day.
Jiyoo stepped down from her bed.The walk to the attic felt so extremely long.She could reach the room in ten seconds normally, but she had to be careful.She had to lift her heels as she walked, stop several times to listen to the sounds downstairs, and open the attic door in a way that didn’t make a rattling sound.
Only after entering the attic and closing the door could she finally relax.The attic was located directly above the first-floor bathroom.There was little chance the sound of her footsteps would cross the living room to reach the ears of her sleeping mother.She could now let her heels touch the ground.
Jiyoo turned on the light and started to move around the room.Being careful not to touch any of the boxes, she worked her way into the forest of cardboard.The box of puppets was in the corner of the room where she had left it.She removed the lid and found what she was looking for: Four hand puppets, four chairs with stakes to seat the puppets, a roundtable, a set of teacups, plates, and other things for playing house.
Jiyoo had originally planned on bringing the box to her room to play with.But now that she saw it, she gave up on that idea.It was much heavier than she’d imagined.It wasn’t too heavy to lift, but itwastoo heavy to both lift and move.It was probably so heavy because of all the wood, which, except for the puppets themselves, comprised everything in the box.With difficulty, she could probably drag the box across the floor, but there were too many obstacles to navigate.And the room was too cold to play in.She had only been standing here for a few moments, but the cold wooden floor had made her feet into icicles.There was also a draft seeping in through the ceiling, causing her to shiver.
Just take the puppets.Jiyoo had made up her mind, but there was one problem.What if mother woke up and came upstairs?Jiyoo gave Mischievous Mouse a quiz.If Mother suddenly opened the door to her room, how many puppets could she hide before Mother saw?
One, the mouse answered.
Just one?Jiyoo asked in protest.
Just one,the mouse said again.You act as if that’s a small thing.It’s Mother we’re talking about.
Mother decided the rules.And she also gave punishment when the rules were broken.Excuses didn’t work on Mother.She never forgave anyone, even if they begged.She showed no mercy, not even to Jiyoo.In fact, she had made Jiyoo an orphan once.
Mother and Stepfather lived in Cheongyeon together.Mother’s work was in Incheon, and Jiyoo lived at her grandmother’s house in Hagik-dong.She attended the kindergarten near Mother’s work.On weekdays, Mother would stop by Grandmother’s house to drop Jiyoo off at kindergarten on her way to work.She would do the same thing on her way home from work, but in reverse.Jiyoo spent the weekends at her stepfather’s house.
Jiyoo didn’t complain about living apart from Mother.After all, she was able to see her every day, so she never forgot she had a mother.
But when Mother made Jiyoo an orphan, this wasn’t possible.Mother wouldn’t come to take her to school.She wouldn’t call either.Jiyoo would have to take the school bus and spend the weekends at Grandmother’s.Most times it only lasted for a week.But it could last as long as a month when mother was really angry.Whenever this happened, Grandmother would hold Jiyoo tight, her eyes filled with tears.Then she would mutter something Jiyoo didn’t quite understand.“My child, it’s my fault you suffer.”
When Grandmother cried like this, Auntie would always erupt in anger: “Oh, would you stop it.”
Sometimes Auntie would drive Jiyoo to and from kindergarten.She would even take Jiyoo to the toy store or cat café to cheer her up.Jiyoo liked Auntie almost as much as Grandma, but these acts of kindness just weren’t enough.Auntie wasn’t Mother.So, it was best not to get in trouble in the first place, even if it meant having less fun.
Jiyoo took out the first puppet.It was wearing a plaid shirt and jeans and on its chest was the word “Dad.”The second puppet had short hair and was named “Mom.”“Baby Brother” was wearing a red hat.And then there was a princess with long braided hair and a crown: “Yuna.”
Reading this name, Jiyoo realized whom these puppets belonged to.They were Mother’s.Or to be more exact, Mother when she was a little girl, back when she lived with Grandma and Grandpa in this cabin.It was hard for Jiyoo to imagine that Mother had ever been little.
Jiyoo calmly drew a family tree in her head.Grandmother, Grandpa, who had passed away, and Auntie, Mother’s older sister.“Baby Brother” had to refer to Jiyoo’s uncle.The only problem was that Jiyoo didn’t have an uncle, at least not on her mother’s side.Another problem was that there was no older sister in the puppet family.In other words, someone who shouldn’t be there was, and someone who should be there wasn’t.
