Page 100 of Mate
He doesn’t protest. “I’ll be outside. Call if you want me back in.”
The second the door clicks behind me, Layla asks, “Do you know what covenant the Alpha of the Northwest must abide by?”
I nod.
She seems relieved. When she resumes speaking, most of the awkwardness has melted away, and I realize that the tense atmosphere was due to her awareness that Koen is, by law, not allowed to touch me.
Her newfound directness is refreshing. “The main symptom of Estrus is that you’ll want to have sex. A lot. So much so, it might be hard to engage in any other activity. Some people equate the experience to being intoxicated, but that has a negative connotation many healthcare professionals reject. Estrus is its own unique state. Youwillbe able to make decisions. The brain fog and arousal noise will just make it hardto think of the consequences and delay gratification. This will last for anywhere from two to five days. You will spend this time alone with a chosen partner, or partners, depending on your preferences.”
The idea of allowing anyone but Koen to touch me is ludicrous, but I nod anyway.
“Estrus often accentuates sexual behaviors. For instance, you might find yourself wanting to please your partner more than usual. In turn, a partner tends to become very protective of a Were in heat. They will not take well to threats against them, but they also won’t necessarily be able to distinguish a real threat from, say, someone dropping by with a casserole. That’s why isolation is usually considered the ideal scenario.”
“What if a Were doesn’t have a partner? Does anyone just do it . . . alone?”
I’m not surprised by how swiftly Layla shakes her head. “I highly discourage it. Plainly, you won’t be able to orgasm without interaction with a partner, which will make the experience miserable.”
Keep touching yourself and lick the base of my throat.
Yeah. I can picture that a little too clearly.
“But,” she continues, “you’ll easily find a partner. I remember reading that sexual activity can be perceived as something shameful and taboo among Humans.Weres have a highly pragmatic attitude toward sex, and I’m sure many would volunteer to help. And I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that even though I fully understand how disorienting the situation must be, most Weres who go through a Heat find it a highly pleasurable bonding experience. Not to mention that it’s not always easy for us to conceive, so the increase in fertility is often appreciated.”
I cover my mouth. “I’m an idiot.”
“Why?”
“Pregnancy is the whole biological reason behind this, isn’t it?”
“Well, yes. Is that something you’re interested in?”
I used to be. Funnily enough, when I thought I was a Human orphan, the idea of having a child was magic: someone who might share my DNA. Someone to take care of. I used to picture it like a do- over of sorts: my child would not be traumatized into forgetting the first six years of its life. My child would suffer zero assassination attempts before its eighteenth birthday— or after. My child would never know true fear or hunger, and its happiness would soak up all the sadness I’d generated and polluted the world with.
Back in college, whenever Misery would catch me playing with the neighbor’s kids, pinching their cheeks, calling them cute, she’d roll her eyes so hard, her contacts nearly popped out.I hear they shit everywhere.And eat all your peanut butter.
That’s true ofyou, too.
Precisely. Do you really need two of me?
So, yes. I used to be interested. But now . . . “It’s unclear whether it’s even possible. Because of my genetic makeup.”
“I see. Well, in the eventuality that you can, let me make it clear: you will never be asked to put your body through anything you don’t want to. And my job is to help you do what’s best for you.”
I smile at her, genuinely grateful. “In that case, I need one thing from you.”
“Of course. What is it?”
“I need you to make sure that I donotgo into Heat.”
CHAPTER 25
He never thought the world was a particularly fair place. Still, it’s a startlingly vile brand of cruelty on fate’s part, to show him her— what he could have had, if only he’d made different choices.
IN THEORY,” LAYLA SAYS CAREFULLY, “WITH A HIGH DOSE OF PROGESTERONE, weshouldbe able to prevent Estrus.”
“Perfect. Then— ”
“But we don’t know how an injection would interact with your biology.” Her eyes fall on the lab results strewn over the desk, and she starts ticking off her fingers. “Your Estrus started manifesting much earlier than in any other patient I’ve heard of, your hormone levels are still off, and your body doesn’t always respond to medication. When Dr. Henshaw gave you steroid blockers, they were ineffective, just like antipyretic drugs. You could even get a paradoxical reaction— ”
