Page 100 of Jace 4Ever
Nelson nodded at me.
“Are we going to throw Hollywood into a tizzy?”
“Christ, I hope so!” He laughed, shaking the bed. “I have another question for you, and it’s not really about getting married or rings or anything like that.”
It kind of scared me, but I cocked my head and nodded. “Go ahead.”
“Have...have you ever topped?”
My jaw had to have hit the floor with a resounding bang. It took me a good few seconds to compose myself and search his face. “Did you...I mean. Uh. Are you really asking me that?”
“Why wouldn’t I ask?”
“It’s not...you. It’s not something that I thought you would ever...”
“The macho thing? Xavier Renegade would never ask to get pounded into the mattress?” His tone was light and teasing. “Renegade would never want his ass plowed by his fiancé?”
The laugh escaped before I could stop myself. “God, you’re filthy. And no, I didn’t think that. Not any of that. I’m a lingerie wearing bottom who loves when his fiancé slams him against the headboard every night. I just didn’t think that you wanted to change that.”
Nelson’s smile was soft and put a hand on my cheek. “Not always. Not every time, not even every fourth time. But once in a while, maybe I want to see you in those fishnets, and that corset, hovering over me or holding my hips as you fuck me from behind. I’m not true vers, Jace, and I don’t think you are, but I would like to feel that magnificent dick in me once in a while.”
“When you put it like that, I’d like to put it in you.”
We started giggling like two school kids over a fart joke. This moment, along with a thousand others we had experienced in the past months, made me sure, made more than sure, that this was real and it was everything that we both wanted.
I’d never hoped for any of this. I thought I would date for years. That I would pull myself out of the slum, poverty, and get a nice place and hope for a nice string of boyfriends who petered out because of lack of understanding of my job. Maybe I’d foster some kids. Maybe I’d find a man who loved me much later in life.
Not this. Never this. Sure, I’d fantasized about Nelson. Just like every other red-blooded American who had seen him on the silver screen. But to be here, in a bed with him having just made love after becoming engaged? Never.
A sense of horror ripped through me. In all the months we’d been together, I hadn’t really told him some of my history. And to answer his question truthfully, I had to. I guessed this was going to be the test of our relationship.
“I’ve only topped a few times. I... It was when I was rent boy.”
“Jace...”
I tried to follow the emotions on his face, but they raced by at breakneck speed. He didn’t pull away from me, so I thought that maybe this wouldn’t go badly.
“When were you...?”
“Fifteen. Three years. The last year I was a high-end call boy. Those were the clients who paid for a lot of my non-scholarship expenses at college. They were the ones who were afraid to be found out, pulled out of the closet. But they paid me for all sorts of weird shit. Some of them wanted to bottom. Some of them wanted to be humiliated.”
“Why?” His brow was wrinkled in thought.
“Why what?”
“Why were you a rent boy?”
“Because...my parents died and Jerrod didn’t give a shit about me. He was nineteen and refused to either sign me over to the state or take an iota of interest in me. He moved out of our apartment and disappeared. I was kicked out. No fifteen year old could possibly pay rent. I was functionally homeless for two years. The rent boy gig paid enough for cheap rooms and food. Sometimes I wound up in a shelter. There were seedy people everywhere. I was in a filthy club that didn’t card for alcohol when I met a guy who ran a call boy business, and...he tried to pull me back a few times after I started at Rutgers. The money was tempting, but I swore that after I started college, I wouldn’t have anything to do with rent boys and call boys ever again. And I haven’t.”
“How did Jerrod end up back in your life?”
“His one and only call from jail. He got caught moving coke for some mid-level dealer. Had been for years. I don’t know why he got sloppy that time. He could spot a narc or an undercover cop at a hundred pace. Just not this time. He got nailed, and it was ugly. There was a murder. And he called me.”
“And that was the loan from Denis. To pay for his legal defense.”
I nodded.
Nelson’s hands framed my face. “You, Joseph Acer McIntire, are one of the most amazing men I have ever met. After all the shit that brother of yours put you through, you still took out debilitating loans to help him. You put aside all the shit he did to you and gave him a place to live.” His kiss was soft and careful. “That’s what makes me love you. Your huge heart.”
