Page 112 of Emergency Exit
“You look great,” said Harper.
“Well, itisthe outfit you picked out for me,” said Piper, hereyes twinkling.
“Do your shoes sayAttack of Gayzilla?” demanded Ash, and Harper giggled. “Those are awesome. Where did you find those?”
“They’re an artist that Harper found,” said Piper, twisting her foot to show off the custom-painted Doc Martens with the rainbow-spewing Godzilla monster. “She said I would always feel confident if I wore things I loved. And you know what? I think you’re right. I feel like I could stomp on anything in these boots.”
“Well, stomp on over to the bar, but look out for my nephew, the Olly-monster, because he will love those, and he’s also a tackler.”
“Sounds like my people,” said Piper, handing over her coat and doing as she was told.
There was a steady trickle of people, including the Valkyrie security team, Colin Kwayana, and Tommy and his partner, who immediately went to coo over Olly, who was still playing with Rose. And then, Rowan and Vivian finally arrived, looking flushed and harried.
“Sorry we’re late, Ash,” said Vivian. “We got stuck.”
“In traffic,” Rowan added. Harper glanced at Ash to see if he was buying that.
“That’s Seattle for you,” Ash replied, glancing over his shoulder to where Forest was hovering over Rose. “Mark and the guys already got here.”
“Hi,” said the girl, holding out her hand to Harper. “I’m Vivian.”
Vivian was an auburn-haired twenty-something and dressed in a sequined top that Harper thought was very flattering.
“Ash and Rowan said you got kidnapped,” said Vivian.
“Yes,” said Harper, nodding. “By Ash’s ex-girlfriend. Which turned out to be a good thing because I had just punched my ex-boyfriend. And apparently, it’s very hard to get sympathy from the police or prosecutor if the person you want to press charges against gets kidnapped.”
“Well, I had not thought about that as a legal defense, but I definitely see your point,” said Vivian.
“And I did un-kidnap myself,” said Harper, realizing that possibly Rowan was giving her an odd look. “And Ash came to rescue me. He punched some people, too, and drove a boat.”
“I love it when they do things like that,” said Vivian, nodding. “They look so handsome.”
“Yes!” exclaimed Harper, relieved that Vivian was so understanding. “He really did.” She glanced at Ash and saw him exchanging a mysterious look with his brother.
“I do my best,” said Ash. He checked the hall and saw that it was empty. “OK, I think we can shut the door for a minute. Come on in.”
Harper circulated with Ash and was relieved to see everyone was getting along. She finally found Piper inspecting Ash’s art on her way out of the bathroom.
“You were right,” said Piper, looking up. “I was nervous about this outfit, but I love it. It’s like gay girl glam but also comfortable.”
“Good,” said Harper. “I tried to do pieces you would like and also showed off your legs.”
Piper chuckled and then stopped to lean and peer around Harper. “Oooh,” said Piper, grabbing Harper’s arm. “Who is that?”
Harper turned to look at where Piper was subtly trying to point. “Oh, that’s Mel! Mel is great. They,” Harper used the pronoun pointedly, hoping Piper would get the hint, “are Ash’s IT person. He keeps calling them his IT guy. Which confused me. Apparently, they thinkguysis non-gender specific. They also all call Bob a girl. I recognize that gender is a construct,particularly in this instance, but I was still confused.”
“Who’s Bob?”
“The office bamboo plant.”
“I can see why you were confused.”
“Mel isn’t confusing, though. I like Mel. They have eighty gallons of water stored in their basement and dry goods and are installing solar panels next spring.”
“Ooh,” said Piper, dutifully impressed by Mel’s emergency preparedness.
“Also, they have a crossbow-shaped dice roller. I didn’t know such a thing existed, and I’m not entirely sure what it’s used for, but now I kind of want one.”
