Page 49 of The Secret of Drulea Cottage
She’d known the day was coming, but the newcomers had offered her a welcome distraction from that truth.Now that the anniversary o’ her death is finally here, though, it almost feels like I’m losing Mum all over again.
Bethany’s final words rang in her ears.“You must stay away from the water…”Briony could still see Bethany’s beatific expression when she’d heard her daughter’s answer, a promise that was now broken.
What would she say if she were here? Would she be angry or frightened?
Briony swept her hand across the table, knocking her cup and saucer onto the floor. She slammed a fist down, not noticing the pain it caused. Then she turned her attention to the horizon far beyond her cottage, cursing the waves that had stolen so much from her.
When they stole my father, they also stole my only chance at a normal life. The sea left me an outcast. Mum tried her best, but ultimately, she was just as broken as that china.
Briony wandered over to the cup and saucer’s remains, gathering them in her hands in the same manner as the tears gathering in her eyes. “Mum, why did you have to leave me like this? I’m so alone…”
She sat on the floor for several minutes, unwilling to move and face a reality that left her aching for comfort and belonging. It was so much easier just to sit in her grief, so much easier to let it billow over her and knock her down like those dreadful waves below her home.
Suddenly, the toll of the mantel clock roused her from her grief-stricken state only for her to find long, shallow cuts across her palms where she held the broken china.
Briony dropped the pieces, wincing at the pain that was all too noticeable now. She didn’t mind it though; the pain reminded her of all she’d lost in the past year.’Tis gratifying in a way. A suitable punishment fer forgetting what today is.
I doubt anyone else will see it that way though.She hurried to the well just past Drulea Cottage to wash the blood from her hands. She didn’t worry that someone else would be there, for no one else dared use it.
People claimed the well was a gateway to the fairy realm and that a group of trows[19]liked to frequent it. Most bairns believed they might get snatched away if they got too close, but Briony had always known it was just nonsense. Now the stories served as a good way to make sure she wasn’t bothered whenever she went there.
The water stung as it flowed over her marred skin, but its cool temperature was refreshing on the already hot day. Briony inspected her hands to make sure they were no longer bleeding. Even though the cuts weren’t very deep, they would still need to be wrapped. Briony did this quickly, wondering if there was any way to hide the injuries from curious eyes.
What a scolding I’ll hear if Adaira learns I’ve hurt myself. Just as I would have heard from my mum if she were still here.More tears threatened to fall from her eyes at that thought. Now that her mother was gone, she wished with everything in her to hear Bethany’s voice again even if it was only to reprimand her for being so careless.
She took a few unsteady steps, then a few more, doing her best to recall precisely how her mother had sounded—
“Dearie, what are you doing here?”
Briony started. Her heart had been so overwhelmed by grief that she hadn’t even noticed how far she’d wandered down the hill.
Adaira stood at the inn’s entrance, broom in hand, as she gave Briony a hard stare.
“Adaira, g-good morneen,” the midwife choked, trying to force a smile onto her face.
Adaira put down her broom and placed her hands on her hips. “Nay, ’tis na a ‘good morneen,’ Briony, so don’ pretend otherwise. Did you think I would forget what today is?”
“Don’ worry about me, Adaira. I’ll be fi—”
“Don’ you dare say ‘fine.’” Her eyes flashed. “You know I know you better than that. Yer na to walk Santiago today, and yer na to report to Dr. Sherwin. I’ll take care o’ it. You need to take a day to yerself. Visit yer mum’s grave, and let yerself feel everything that needs to be felt. You did na let yerself truly mourn her passing when it happened. You closed yerself off so much that fer a while, I feared I’d never get my old friend back. Go to the churchyard and be with yer mum.”
Adaira’s tone and body language left no room for argument, so Briony simply embraced her friend. No more words were said as they stood there, for none were needed.
I thank You, Lord, fer a friend such as this.
When Briony pulled back, the sad tears on her cheeks now mingled with joyous ones. She nodded a silent goodbye and went on her way, still hurting but feeling far less alone.
*
Bethany Fairborn had always been a strange woman. She had been so concerned with people’s opinions of her that she had taken many precautions in raising Briony, precautions that proved futile. Briony knew all about manners and keeping a pristine house and arranging her hair just so—
Briony sighed.Did Mum truly think any o’ that would change the way the neighbors looked at us? These people have trouble turning a blind eye to even the slightest flaw.
And an illegitimate child is no slight flaw.
What’s even worse is I’m at least the third in a line o’ illegitimate daughters. That makes it a cycle o’ wantonness, one I can never hope to escape from.
Mum should have moved away to get a fresh start in a town where no one knew the name Fairborn, but that stubborn woman refused to give up the family home, no matter how difficult it made our lives.
