Page 1 of Instructed By the Summoner
An Unexpected Lesson
Sex demons wereterribleat filing.
Xak should know, he was pretty sure he was Hell’s premier expert on infernal organization. You couldn’t flunk out of two demonic colleges and be on your way to a third without handling a truly distressing amount of punitive busywork.
Death demons were meticulous. Tricksters had Hell’s most state-of-the-art systems, with organizational rules that still gave him headaches. Sex demons, on the other hand, seemed to live by the motto of “drop it somewhere, and trust someone else to deal with it.”
Unfortunately, Xak was “someone else.” Endless rows of filing cabinets under buzzing electric lights and drifts of paper that nearly reached his knees at points. And Xak. There to deal with it all.
“I’m not so inclined to indulge you as my predecessor, young Xak. You may consider this an opportunity to meditate on your future within this department.”The lecture repeated itself as Xak picked up another stack of papers and started sorting themby date. Literally, thanks to Lord Daskimos leaving a bit of magic behind that had it echoing again and again through the room.“You’ve delayed long enough. You must schedule your first summons with a suitable candidate, or I’ll have no choice but to expel you. Ours is not a theoretical discipline.”
It wasn’t like Xakmeantto delay. Not at the start, anyway. The first time, he’d been recovering from a curse. The second, the summoner had canceled onhim.And the the third time… Well, fine, the third time had been on purpose. He’dheardabout that woman. She liked demons because humans wouldn’t survive her preferred style of pleasure.
Since then, he’d made every excuse he could think of to put off being summoned. He justknewhe was going to screw it up. He screwed everything up. And he couldn’t help but think that maybe he wasn’t cut out to be an incubus after all.
The problem was that hewantedto be an incubus. Theoretically. Studying at the college of sex magic (or, as the students called it, Screw U) was the happiest he’d ever been. It was only since Lord Daskimos had taken over as the Chair of the department that things had gotten difficult.
Well, what could you expect from a man who acted like he was still in the 16th century, insisting everyone call himLord?
Xak sighed, reaching down to scoop up another pile of papers. Old tests, this time. Figured that the exams he’d sweated over ended up trampled under foot and forgotten. As he sorted them by name, he tried not to think about his friends, off celebrating Halloween as only demons could.
Then he felt the tug.
Xak had never beenactuallysummoned (it wasn’t like virgin incubi appeared in a lot summoning tomes), but he still recognized the feeling. An all over pull,compulsion and curiosity both, amustmingled withshouldand a smoky, metallic burn at the back of his throat.
The texts all had the worst words for what happened next.Unmaking.Discorporating. Re-stitching. Every Hell-scorched one of them sounding like an existential crisis waiting to happen.
It didn’t hurt as much as he’d expected. Actually, it didn’t hurt at all, though there was a strange sense ofpressurewhen he came back together within the smoky confines of a summoning circle. Ten fingers. Two horns. Two small, batlike wings. No hooves. And he still looked basically like himself, so the summoner hadn’t gotten creative on him. (Another idea that made his skin crawl. What if he came back together with dicks for fingers?)
But all in one piece or not, he was stillin a summoning circle.Exactly the situation he’d been avoiding for the last year and a half. If Lord Daskimos was behind it, Xak was going straight to the Dean.
The smoke cleared slowly, giving Xak’s anxiety time to build. The circle was chalked in the American style, five lit candles defining its limits. Tidy, he had to admit. Nice clean lines. Then, finally, he could see into the room beyond. A sofa. Pale gray walls decorated with large, colorful textiles wherever there wasn’t a bookshelf.
And a pirate.
Wait, he’d been summoned by apirate?
Don’t be stupid Xak. Humans have Halloween, too.
A human, wearing the remains of a pirate costume. About Xak’s height, at a little under six feet, with similar dark hair and dark eyes. The likeness ended there. Warm brown skin in contrast to Xak’s paler complexion, and soft where Xak was cut.Thickwas the word for it, meat there that a proper incubus might get to squeeze and explore. Filipino features, with a softness around his eyes that implied an easy smile.
He wasn’t smiling, though. And he tasted of frustration and hurt. That … probably wasn’t a good sign.
“Please, please, please tell me you didn’t summon me to kill anyone.” Ok, that had to be the least intimidating response to a a summoning ever. “You can’t compel me, you know.”
Not much better. And, considering he could taste true magic in the air, not exactly true. Hellfire, he’d known he’d be bad at this.
The summoner stared at him. Xak stared back.
“Wait, what?” The human shook his head. “Are– Ahm. Yes. I know. I wouldn’t– Do people usually summon incubi to kill people?”
For a second, Xak was relieved. That wasn’t the response of someone who’d accidentally summoned an incubus while attempting to raise a death demon. No, that was the answer of someone who knew exactly what he’d summoned and had done it on purpose andoh fuckXak’d been summoned for sex.
Which was literally hismajorand he was totally for it. Really. In theory. In practice…
Well, what practice?
Now wasn’t the time. Focus on the positive. No murder. No dick fingers. Surprisingly appealing human mage in a pirate costume.
