Page 27 of New Beginnings at the Little Christmas Inn
‘Mind you, some of Eli’s lot would eat anything that’s free,’ Karl observed. ‘They’re wasted on them. They just want their lager. And their tequila shots.’
‘They’d be wasted anyway,’ Livvy replied. ‘Delicious though they are, we can’t eat them all. I’ll have a word with Fab about quantities. He’s over catering. Now, chaps, any ideas how I’m going to put these up?’ Livvy brandished the box of lights. ‘I’m really not sure I’ve a ladder long enough to get these up where I want them.’
‘You don’t want a ladder, my lovely.’ Karl’s eyes gleamed. ‘Our Ernie will have just the thing. Leave it with me.’
Evening service resumed and, with Eli manning the bar, Livvy was free to decorate the tree. Stewie insisted he stay on to help. They were interrupted by a loud rumbling outside. The pub’s walls shook, lights flashed in through the windows and adeafening horn sounded. Startled, Livvy peered out through the window, relieved to have an excuse to go outside to investigate. Tree dressing had been accompanied by raucous carol singing from various members of Eli’s family. They’d gone through most of theCome and Praisebangers.
Earlier, Livvy had watched in concern as there seemed some kind of argument between Eli and an older relative, possibly his Uncle Gerry. Eli had appeared to calm things, and all was cheerful enough now, well-oiled by several rounds of her finest lager. The quality of singing had deteriorated in direct correlation to the amount of alcohol consumed, however, and she was glad of the break.
Going outside, with Stewie at her heels, it was to find Karl standing in the evening gloom with another man. Behind them was a monstrously large green and yellow tractor. It loomed, slightly threateningly, in the seaside drizzle.
‘This is my little brother Ernie,’ Karl said. ‘He drives the fastest John Deere in the west.’ The man nodded and grinned. Wearing navy overalls, he had a battered tweed cap pulled down over his face and was chewing a match.
Livvy looked at them blankly.
‘Maybe you need to be a certain age to get the joke,’ he added, ‘you’re too young. Ernie said you can borrow the tractor to put the lights up.’
‘I can? How?’
‘You get in the cherry picker here and he’ll hoist you up.’ He turned and cheerfully slapped it with his palm.
Livvy’s mouth dropped open. She looked at the tractor and then up at the roof of The George towering above her. Then she eyed the cherry picker. It was no more than a large bucket attached to the front. ‘Get in there?’ she squeaked. ‘It doesn’t look as if it’ll hold me. I’m not doing that.’
‘Go on, Liv. I’ll get in with you.’ Stewie was obviously up for the adventure. ‘I’ll hang on to you while you fix the lights. It’ll be a right laugh.’
‘You’ll be fine,’ Karl reassured her. ‘Ernie’s won all sorts of ploughing competitions. He’s a dab hand at the wheel of his tractor.’
‘He may well have won ploughing competitions,’ Livvy protested, glancing at the man doubtfully, who still hadn’t said a word. ‘But hoisting me up in his cherry picker thingy is a different matter.’
‘Don’t you like heights, my lovely?’
‘It’s not that, Karl. I’m just not convinced it’s safe.’
Karl shook the cherry picker making it rattle. ‘It’s okay, Ernie’s got it on lock. Haven’t you, Ern?’
The silent Ernie nodded enthusiastically. His only comment was the match lifting skywards.
Karl jiggled the bucket again to underline his point. ‘See, it’s not going nowhere. Won’t swing around. Safe as houses. Reckon it’ll be a whole load easier than perching on the top of a ladder.’
He had a point. Livvy wished she’d thought through the Christmas lights plan beforehand. What was the alternative though? A dark, undecorated pub? It hardly gave off seasonal vibes and she wanted her first Christmas to be perfect. Thinking of all the other decorations already up in Lullbury she said, ‘Well, if you’re sure.’ She gazed up in trepidation at the soaring walls of the pub and at the steep incline of the roof. She blew out a defeated breath. ‘I can’t see how else I’m going to do it.’
‘Sweet,’ Stewie cried. ‘I’ll go and get the boxes of lights. After all, it’s not Christmas without lights.’
‘What you got to attach the lights to the guttering, then?’ Karl asked, rubbing his hands against the chilly air, his breath misting out.
‘Some of these plastic ties.’ Livvy pulled one out of the pocket of her fleece. ‘Do you think they’ll be strong enough?’ she asked, showing him. ‘It gets pretty windy up here.’
‘That’s the badger. If I was you, I’d only put ’em on the car park side where it’s more sheltered. The wind’ll whip them off in no time on the seaward facing walls. I’d go up and do it myself.’ Karl huffed a bit. ‘But Jen wouldn’t hear of it.’ Jen was his wife. From what Livvy had heard, she wouldn’t argue with her either.
Stewie returned, carrying the pack of ties and the pile of lights. Livvy was beginning to wish she hadn’t bought quite so many.
Ernie swung himself into the tractor cab and the engine shuddered and rumbled into life. Livvy was overcome with a fit of nervous giggles and had to have help from Karl to clamber into the cherry picker bucket, with Stewie getting in behind. Two seconds too late, the smell rose up in a great swell of acrid animal waste.
‘Oi, Ern,’ Karl yelled. ‘What was the last thing you used this bucket for, mate?’
A voice rose over the tractor noise.
‘What did he say?’ Livvy asked, brushing something greeny-brown and pungent off her jeans.
