Page 31 of Darkness Colliding
“I think he feared me. I think he feared that I’d be stronger than he could control, and he knew I’d someday try to stop the things he was doing.”
Her voice is steady as she considers everything.
He got rid of her because she was a threat to him.
My throat feels thick as I try to think of a single thing to say to her. But I can’t. If I speak, I’ll tell her what I’ve been hiding.
“Why are you here, Cameron?” Nollix’s voice is this angry sound like he’s attacking me with the simple statement. I can’t think of a thing to say, but it seems he’s waited to say this for a long time.
So I’ll answer him with honesty.
“I’m here because Violence is here.” Heat washes over me. It’s been stifling the entire time we’ve been here, but an unbearable searing heat now burns through the air. It hurts. “I’m here because I fucked up her life. I’m taking responsibility.”
“Responsibility.” The sneer against his lips can be seen if I tilt my head enough. “I can feel your dishonesty. Fucking Violence can feel your lies.”
The Carcass Creature halts abruptly making me cling a little closer to Violence.
Nollix drops to the ground and looks up at me from several feet below.
“What are you hiding, Cameron Crows?” He glares hard at me, and I feel her tense beneath my touch as she too waits for my response.
Link slides down the side of the creatures as well, and the two of them pin me with this hard look of controlled aggression.
“I—I don’t have to be here.” At the sound of my words, her head tilts until she’s peering back at me from over her shoulder. “I created the bond that links Violence to me.” My words seem to come slowly because fear is gripping my chest. I’m fucking terrified to tell her. I’m so afraid she’ll hate me, but, most of all, I’m afraid she’ll leave me. “I can break the bond. I can walk away from all of this. I can walk away from you. And you can walk away from me.”
I’ve never told her I could break our bond. It’s a secret I’ve kept to myself for months now. Her brows lower over her pretty eyes, and I feel the heavy feeling building in her as it streams right into me.
“Why don’t you?” It’s a whispered sound that comes from her lips.
It’s just her and me up here, me clinging to her like she’s already slipping away. Right now, they’re all watching me. I can’t hide anything anymore. I don’t want to.
I want to be honest with them. With her.
“I’m fucking terrified if I break the bond … I won’t feel the same way anymore. I’m so fucking afraid if I let you go, you’ll just… go.” Is that how I’m supposed to say it? Is that how you tell someone that they’re the most important thing in your entire life? That you’re terrified of losing them. “I,” my voice dips low like the press of everyone’s attention is making my words dissolve against my tongue, “I love you, Violence.”
My chest heaves against her, and I feel like I can’t get a real breath of air to save my life. Her gaze searches mine, her lips parted like she wants to speak, but nothing comes out. With each passing second, my heart beats harder against my chest.
I’m fucking everything up.
She leans in closer, her hair skimming against my temple, and I watch her every move. Until her lips press softly to mine. For an instant, I don’t respond. The last thing I expected was anything but rejection.
And now, she’s kissing me.
My lips part hers, and our tongue meet in the slowest way. Every perfect stroke of our tongues feels like something bigger than what it really is.
What if this is goodbye?
If this is goodbye, I want it to be the best goodbye she’s ever felt. My fingers dig into her hip as magic strikes through my fingertips and the hum of her moan against my lips makes me wish we were alone. I kiss her harder, but I know what’s about to come, and I can’t seem to feel anything but an aching pain in my chest.
Because in the next moment, I sever our bond.
She gasps against my mouth, and I have to force myself to pull back from her. My hand slips away, and I feel a conflict of emotions all through me. There’s an emptiness where our bond once was. But I still want her. My heart still hurts just knowing I let her go.
She isn’t mine to keep.
I forced my way into her life. Fate does mysterious things. But some things we fuck up all by ourselves. She doesn’t need me, and we both know I shouldn’t be here. Even if there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.
She stares at me, her lips parted, her fingers pressing to her lower lip like she can still feel my mouth against hers.
Does she feel it too? Does she feel empty inside like I’m missing?
Her head dips low, and I wonder if this will be the last time we are ever this close again.
When she speaks, my whole world changes, I swear.
“I love you too, Cam.”
