Page 62 of Destruction of Two
“Then I’ll create a portal back to our dimension.” I did it once, I can do it again.
Pride and cool amusement flicker across his mouth. It’s a gesture a parent makes at their child, and for an instant, I feel deeply connected with him. “The problem with that is that you must be vigilant. You can disturb the fabric that separates dimensions. That magic creates a pull on the fabric and could tear it right down the middle. Anything could get through into our world.” He says that last part with the smallest of smiles and turns to me. “We wouldn’t want that, now would we?”
Probably not.
“Come, Miss Castillo.” He holds his palm out and I take it without hesitation. “Let me show you the finer parts of hell.”
* * *
The sand is soft and feels literally like clouds as I run my fingers through it. I know we can’t stay here long, but this place is amazing and sitting by the edge of the little lake next to Shade makes me feel like I belong in ways the Academy never really made me feel.
I feel like a traitor for even thinking it.
Silence presses between us, but it’s comfortable, even while my mind races of all the things I want to say to him, everything I want to tell him. I haven’t told anyone what happened to me when I was here except in broken bits and pieces.
But I want to tell him.
“I came into my full powers,” I admit tentatively, waiting a little nervously for his reaction.
A smile beams against his mouth. “That’s fantastic, Izara. I’m proud of you.”
A tightening feeling clenches at my throat. “But it only happened here in hell. When I went back, it’s like my Prod hid from me again, back into that destructive shell I thought I’d broken her out of.” Broken myself out of.
Shade leans back against the sand, his palms digging into it. “It’s because the powers of hell inside you thrive in this dimension, from the power that’s here. Ours nullifies your Prod.”
“It’s because hell is so destructive that my Prod likes it here, right?”
Shade snickers and turns. Beside us are creatures as big as pigs, with reptilian features drinking from the lake. He holds out his hand and whispers a few slithering words that have the creatures instantly bounding over to him, rubbing their scaled heads against his palm.
“Hell isn’t just about destroying, it isn’t just about sinners. It’s about joy and power, about letting go of control and giving in to your wilder side.” He croons to the creature, and it breaks away from him and waddles over towards me. I try not to flinch as it bumps its head against my shoulder, but I give in and stroke a hand across its hide. Its dry skin is covered in ridges that scrape my palms, but that doesn’t take away from its cuteness.
“It was pretty bad when I was here,” I confess on a quiet whisper. “I met my father…”
His eyebrows raise. “Oh?”
I swallow the lump in my throat and push on. “The Messenger of Chaos took me to his palace and tried to force me on his throne. He wants me to stay here, rule at his side.” Saying it aloud still feels wrong and vile, like something that’s not meant to be and the wrongness of it curls deeply and tightly in my gut until it’s painful.
“But you won’t,” Shade concludes.
“I won’t.” The creature makes a whining noise and lays its head on my lap as if it means to comfort me. A smile pulls at my lips at the gesture.
“But you still feel hell’s pull because you are part demon, and that part of you thrives here. The power... it’s amazing.” He speaks like he’s wrenching the feelings, the words, straight out of my soul. Because he knows and feels the same. “Once you come here and feel the brute force of the power, it’s hard to go back.”
“Will my powers ever be as strong there as they are here?” My wings twitch, and I’m almost scared to hear the answer to that question. A part of me, a giant part of me, wants that power so badly. Because I don’t know what will happen to me, to my men, if my Prod hides again. If she only explodes in violent bursts to kill everyone around me like my visions all but promised would happen.
Yes, a part of me did come here for selfish reasons, but a bigger part of me came here to find a way to protect them.
I won’t have them end up like Adam.
I fucking won’t.
“No.”
The softly spoken word makes the hope I held in my heart chip away painfully. Right. Of course not.
“But…” he continues, stroking his chin in thought. “There is one way. It’s forbidden, though.”
“What is it?” The eager way I reach for him should be embarrassing, but I’m desperate despite the word ‘forbidden’ echoing in my mind. I shove it away and focus only on one thing. That it’s possible for me to get full control of my Prod.
