Page 56 of The Iron Fae
And stop fucking with mine.
"What feelings, again?" He pinches his brows together, feigning confusion, before his tongue slides over his teeth and he grins again.
I purse my lips. "Two can play at this game."
"Eh, I don't know. I'm not sure I'm into playing as you do." Lincoln rises from his chair. "Well, I best be on my way."
"You're leaving?" I jump too quickly from my seat.
He looks me up and down, knowingly. "I've got responsibilities to return to in the Shadow Court. I've got to make sure it doesn't fall apart. I'm doing this for you." He tucks my hair behind my ear. "Wouldn't want you taking your Court back and finding it in utter disarray." His broad back faces me as he moves quietly across the room.
"As your future queen I have two questions."
He swivels on his toes, bowing without dropping our eye contact. "Yes, my queen?" His words are a rasp of a sound.
Wow. Why did I just shiver so hard?
"How's Jase?"
"Oh," he says, "he's doing well. I've checked in with him a time or two and he's basically spent the entire time complaining that he misses you and asking me personal questions about my brothers. So... same old Jase, I guess."
I smile softly.Same old Jase. God, I miss him."I'll see him soon through, right?"
"Yes. Now that you have your powers, I'd say it's about damn time we start making some real moves. You're not so fragile anymore." He adds the last part a bit more quietly than the rest. "You... ah, had a second question?"
"Well, this isn't so much a question as it is a request."
He hums, bouncing on his feet as he waits.
"Don't put up your wall anymore."
Lincoln freezes.
"I want... I want to be a part of your day and I want you to be a part of mine. Share your thoughts with me and quit blocking me out."
"... it's for your own good. And mine."
He’s making me insane.
"No." I shake my head. "You don't get to decide what's good for me and what's not anymore. It's my job to create those boundaries for myself."
He nods, just once, almost robotically.
"Is that it?"
"Yes."
Lincoln pockets his hands, escorting himself out of the room without a second glance. The door closes behind him, the wall he's put up so often slams into place. I blink at the roughness of the feeling. It's like he's a fucking teenager and I've just told him to come out of his bedroom for once and he's pissed about it.
I laugh lightly to myself, but it quickly fades as I become aware of the muddle of feelings Lincoln had waiting on the other side of the wall. Desire and want, drowned out by dedication and tradition, are all buried under a deep past of hurt and sorrow. It slams against my chest stealing away every ounce of breath.
It hurts. Being in Lincoln's head might actually destroy me, if I let it.
Fifteen
Small Talk About Big Things
There isn'tanything left to do alone in my room but fret. I'm chewing on my nails, trying to sort through Lincoln's mind. His thoughts are there, but awfully silent as he notices my presence. He only grows slightly more distant as he reaches the Shadow Court and busies himself with work. A distraction.
