Page 165 of Game Changer
“I’m gay.”
Murdock froze, and stared at Scott like he’d just told him he was a wizard.
Please don’t yell at me. Not about this.
“You’re gay.”
“Yes.”
Murdock tented his hands in front of his face and leaned back in his chair. When he lowered his hands, he was smiling. “How many times have you said those words out loud?”
Scott smiled shakily back, relieved. It was going to be okay.
“Before now? Twice. The first time was to my agent. The second time to Carter, Huff, and Bennett.”
Murdock nodded. “Smart, telling them first.”
“I thought so.”
“And you’re tellingmebecause...”
“I didn’t want you to hear it from someone else. I want to go public. Soon.”
Murdock’s face turned serious again. “When, exactly?”
“After the playoffs,” Scott said quickly. “I promise. I don’t have to tell the rest of the team just yet. I’m not trying to distract anyone.”
Murdock seemed to consider this. “Why now?”
“Because I don’t want to live a lie anymore. And... I’m with someone. It isn’t fair to him.”
“Ah. You’re in love. That makes sense. Love makes men do all sorts of dumbass things.”
Scott gave a small smile. “I think this actually might be the smartest thing I’ve done.”
“You know what’s going to happen, right? When this gets out? You got a plan for that?”
“Kind of.”
Murdock swore under his breath. Scott wondered if maybe they were done. Then Murdock said, “When I played, I was one of about two non-white players in the league.”
Scott didn’t say anything.
“My road to the NHL was...challenging, let’s say. I don’t think there was a single game where I didn’t hear a player, or a fan, or a parent, or, hell, even a ref, have something to say about a Black man playing hockey.”
“You were a trailblazer,” Scott said.
“Sure. In retrospect, maybe. Didn’t feel like that at the time. I just wanted to play hockey. Didn’t think much about my legacy beyond being the greatest center the game had ever seen.”
Scott laughed.
“Funny thing is that the press, all they wanted to talk about was my skin color. How revolutionary I was. How I was changing the game. How I had overcome so many obstacles. It was all just noise to me back then.”
“And now?”
“Now I look back and I can see why all that noise was important. And Iknowit was important because players like Vaughan tell me that they were inspired by me. I made them feel a little more certain that they belonged in this sport that we all love.”
Scott nodded. “I know there’s going to be a lot of...noise. I’m prepared for that. I’m focused on my game. On my team. On winning. But if I can make even one kid more comfortable with who they are, make them a little braver about living their life without shame... I’m not going to run from that. I want that.”
