Page 82 of Heated Rivalry 1
Ilya shrugged and looked away. He knew it was the wrong reaction, but he felt a horrifying swell of emotion that he couldn’t let Shane see.
“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about,” Shane said angrily. “This is hard enough without you being an asshole.”
Ilya turned back to him, his face carefully hiding everything he was feeling. “What do you want, Hollander?”
“I—” Shane didn’t seem to have any idea of what to say next.
“We get together, and we fuck. Is simple,” Ilya said.
“Simple,” Shane grumbled. “Right.”
Ilya shrugged again. “Is simple for me.”
“Bullshit.”
Ilya rolled his eyes. Why was Hollander saying any of this? Why now?
“I think I’m gay,” Shane blurted out.
Ilya looked at him, startled, for a moment. Then he laughed. “Oh yeah? What gives you that idea?”
Shane glared at him, which made Ilya laugh more.
“The last time my dick was in your mouth, I thought you might be a little gay,” Ilya teased.
“Fuck off.You’renot gay.”
“No,” Ilya said, serious again. “Not completely.”
“Well... I think I might be. Completely.”
Ilya studied him a moment, then said, “Okay. So you are gay. So what?”
“Well, it’s sort of a big deal! To me, at least. Sorry if I’m boring you!”
Ilya slid off the dresser and went to the mini fridge. He pulled out a can of Coke and a can of ginger ale. He handed the ginger ale to Shane as he sat beside him on the bed.
“Why are you telling me that you are gay?” Ilya asked quietly.
Shane laughed humorlessly. “Who else am I gonna tell?”
Ilya took a sip of his Coke. “You are not the only gay NHL player. Probably.”
“I know.”
“So?”
Shane sighed. “It’s not just...being gay,” he said, awkwardly, as if he was still getting used to the word. “It’syou. You and me. Being gay is one thing. Hooking up with your arch fucking rival is another.”
“That is why it is a secret.”
“I know that, but...” Shane ran a hand through his own hair in exasperation. “Last time we were together it was...nice,” he said quietly.
Ilya was silent a moment, then admitted, “It was.”
“It felt like we were...more.”
“We can’t be more, Hollander.”
