Page 88 of Sonnets and Serpents
Silas shot her a disapproving frown, and she glared back. What did he even care about Henry’s situation? He’d had to be chained into helping her—even though he was a member of court who’d actuallyknownHenry, spent time with him.
She couldn’t fight the sting of that revelation. She’d asked Silas if he had any relation to Viscount Bennett, and he’d claimed he wasn’t the man’s son. Was his disdain for royalty so great that he’d also sworn off the entire court? Was that why he’d refused to help Henry until forced into it?
Henry nodded. “It’s sort of a blur. Anyway, um, thanks for—”
“You don’t have to lie,” Silas said quietly, his dark eyes piercing. “You have nothing to be ashamed of.”
Eliza looked between the two of them, trying to read the unspoken. Silas clearly knew something, or thought he knew something. He always thought he knew something.
“I don’t know what you mean,” said Henry. But his fingers were shaking, and he folded his arms across his chest, pulling one knee up like a shield.
“Here’s my theory.” As Silas spoke, he kept his relentless gaze pinned on Henry. “Ceyda blamed me for her father’s death. She came after me but failed. So she followed me back to Loegria only to lose me there, a blessing I’ll ascribe to my antisocial tendencies and her ignorance of the country.Discouraged, she returned home on a ship that happened to be carrying you. Something happened on that ship—either to cause the shipwreck or in response to it. Whatever it was made you interesting enough to her that she took you to the Sarazan healers rather than walking away.”
After a meaningful pause, he added, “I can guess what made you so interesting to a girl who can steal magic. Should I go on, or would you rather say it yourself?”
Henry stared down at his lap, shoulders curled in, all of him closed off like a shuttered window. Eliza wanted to tell Silas to back down, but before she could, he spoke again.
“Maybe this will help.” Gripping the bedpost, he pushed himself to his feet, weight on his good leg.
And then he puffed into a cloud of gray mist, dissipating around a black-patterned viper, its red eyes trained on Henry.
Eliza remembered screaming when she’d first seen that transformation, how terror had iced every bone, freezing her in place. She wanted to smack Silas for inflicting it on Henry without warning.
Except Henry didn’t scream.
He was pale and wide-eyed, but it didn’t seem to be from terror. If anything, he released a gusting breath ... of relief?
Turning human again, Silas eased himself back onto the mattress. He crooked his fingers in Henry’s direction, encouraging him to speak.
Henry opened his mouth but closed it again, like whatever it was couldn’t get past his throat.
Eliza’s insides slunk behind her spine, trying to avoid where she finally realized this conversation might be going.
“You had a rage transformation on the ship,” Silas said quietly. “Right?”
Henry swallowed. Finally, he rasped out, “Is that what they’re called?”
“Well, if you want the Pravish term, it’skemik kirmasi—the flesh rip. Makes it sound a lot more gruesome than it is. I’d say ‘rage transformation’ makes the point well enough. I adopted the phrase from a Cat Affiliate I know.”
Henry shook his head, rubbing his arms like he was trying to find warmth. “You’re so calm. You’re ...”
“Six years into this,” said Silas. He lifted an eyebrow. “And you’re—let me guess—one single transformation?”
Eliza licked her lips. She waited for Henry to deny it, but he looked down and away, his hair shadowing his eyes.
When he spoke, his voice was fragile, wavering. “While we were on the ship, I kept thinking about ... my family, my future, my ... and then, suddenly, I wasn’t ... myself.”
He shot one fleeting glimpse at Eliza, and she tried too late to look comforting, but he’d already turned away. Did he see anger in her face?
She’d come to accept Affiliates through Silas, and there wasn’t any magic in the world that could make her love Henry less, but all the same, it feltunfair. Just months earlier, Henry had been a normal knight, winning a tournament, grinning for the world to see. Even if magic didn’t make someone a monster, it still changed them.
Seeing Henry now, small and ashamed, obviously hurting, how could she not feel upset for him?
Silas nodded. “Animal Affiliates are driven by emotion. When we feel too much, it triggers a transformation. You’ll get better at controlling that, but to a certain extent, you also have to learn to live with it.”
“Were you one all along?” Henry stared at Silas in awe. “All those times at the Reeves estate when you sat on the sofa reading a book and eating Leon’s pastries like ... like ...”
“Like a regular person?” Silas asked dryly. “Iama regular person, and so are you.”
