Page 74 of Cause When You Love Someone
Dr. Stewart covered Clarke’s belly with a blue gel and then rubbed the head of a long, gray instrument over her. A soundthat resembled horses galloping packed the room only seconds later.
“Baby has a strong heartbeat,” Dr Stewart muttered.
Heat traveled in a slow wave over my face. “Strong like his daddy. Handsome like his daddy too.”
Clarke’s low hoot bounced off the walls as my joke landed. After being apart for weeks, I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing I wouldn’t have to live without that melody.
We made it home close to two, and after having lunch, Clarke announced she was going to take a bath. I gave her time alone while I straightened up the kitchen, but the sound of her screaming at the top of her lungs triggered me to drop everything in my hands to the floor.
Like a maniac, I busted through the bathroom door and froze when I spotted the horrified expression on her face.
“Clarke, what’s wrong? Talk to me.”
I searched her body for any signs of damage before a chest-rocking sob brought her to her knees.
“It’s Chaz,” she muttered. “TMZ just reported that he committed suicide.”
Chapter 13
Clarke
FORWARD
Lost in the music playing from my Bluetooth speaker, I watched my body in the mirrors. My studio was far from ready, but there were a few rooms in the spot I could occupy comfortably. Dance had always been my superpower, and I needed to feel invincible.
My heavy-lidded gaze sprang open when my music was interrupted by a call. I didn’t want to be bothered, but I figured whoever was calling wasn’t going to stop.
“Yes, Sage.” I tried to mask the shakiness in my voice when I picked up.
“I wasn’t calling to bother you. I just wanted to check on you. Are you still at the studio?”
“Of course. Lately, it feels like a safe haven.”
“Clarke, you know you’re welcome to spend a few nights with me.”
“I know, and I love you for saying it. I’ll hit you back. I was recording before you called.”
He said a few departing words, then promised to check on me later in the day.
Once I turned the music back on, I played something with an upbeat tempo. Since I was familiar with the choreography for“Bongos” by Cardi B, I filmed myself doing the Sean Bankhead masterpiece with no intention of posting it.
I couldn’t remember the last time I took a social media break, but the distance helped me think. Anytime I made the mistake of scrolling, I got my feelings hurt. There was either a post praising Chaz or a status demonizing me. It was like, as soon as he died, he stopped being known as an abusive cheater and became a saint.
Winded and parched, I went to grab my water bottle when the song ended, but I choked on my spit when my ears caught the beat of the next song.
As soon as the bass dropped, so did my mood. I lay on my back with my vision launched on the ceiling of the studio. My overflow of emotions was what guided me to my spot. Nowadays, the studio was the only place I could purge. I didn’t want to scare Izzy, and I didn’t want to offend Ishmael. Though he never let it show on his face, I wondered if it bothered him to hear me grieve over someone else.
“I knew I would find you in here.”
I looked over my head and saw my mom entering the room. As if she was a stranger, I quickly sat up and pulled my knees up to my chest.
“Clarke, you’ve only been working on this place a short time, and I see things are already coming together.”
I gulped through a dry patch in my throat. “Mom, what are you doing here?”
“I came to see you. I wanted to check on you.”
I pushed my messy hair back. “I’m fine.”
