Page 111 of Why Cheese?
Her eyes fall. “Of course I do. I’m your mother. How could you say that?”
You’re killing her. Look at that. Each mean word cuts her to the bone. It’ll be your fault if she dies. Better apologize now and wash your hands five times or else.
The gremlin screams so loud I can’t hear myself breathing. “Mom…” I whimper, aching to cover my ears with my hands, but that won’t stop the incessant voices in my head.
“Baby girl.” She opens her arms so I can fall to pieces in them. Then she’s free to put them back together however she wants. Create the perfect daughter instead of the one she’s stuck with.
I hug tighter to the four cheeses. “Why…why don’t you go back to the hotel? Wash up? Take the day off. It’s been stressful running this place.”
“Yes, it has,” she says and slowly lowers her arms.
“I’ll…I’ll stay here to clean. Take stock. We…we can figure out what to do with the store tomorrow. Okay?”
Her face doesn’t move below the flaking clay mask. “Why don’t you come back to the hotel with me? We could get breakfast…”
“No.” I shake off her mental hooks impaling into my skin. “A clean room is a godly room, right?” I say as a Hail Mary.
My mom purses her lips tight, breaking her mask in half. The bottom crashes to the floor. Gray dust rises like an angry storm. “Very well. I shall see you tomorrow then we will discuss your…welfare.”
I don’t move a muscle as she walks to the door. After shoving it open, she orders me, “Lock this before someone breaks in and shoots you in the head. There’s barely any brain matter already.”
Only jerking my head, I’m frozen in fear that my mother will turn around and come storming back. She’ll never take my no for an answer and pull me away from here screaming. But the fluffy hotel slippers stomp down the sidewalk and the robe vanishes past the corner windows.
“Oh my god.” I bought myself another night. My body unwinds in one fast snap and I nearly hit the floor in exhaustion.
We’ll figure something out. A way to convince her to let me stay. Or…or maybe we could run away together. Just me and my four precious cheeses with five million dollars to start again.
I laugh like a dying man who won his game of chess. “Thank you,” I tell the four cheeses in my arms. If not for them, I never could have stood up to her. I never had someone to defend before, only my worthless self. Maybe she’ll… No, she has to listen to me now. Take me seriously.
“I should put you somewhere safe.” I have to carry them one at a time. In the end, I place Brie, Cam, Roq, and Cheddy on the table by the old box with its open lid. “Sleep well. I’ll see you tonight.” I kiss my fingers and touch each cheese before trudging up the ladder.
At the top, I close the trap door, then stare at the obvious spot on the floor. A tiny warning shivers up the back of my neck. I shove the old display pedestal over the door, hiding away the cellar. Exhausted, I plant my hands on the small of my back and stretch.
As I stare out the window, a beam of sunlight catches on the soap store across from me. For a fleeting second, I swear a person dips back into the darkness. “I’m just being paranoid.” Scrubbing my cheeks, I yearn to curl up in bed, but…I promised my mother I’d clean up.
Shaking off my exhaustion, I grab a broom and dustpan. Once she sees this place is spotless, she’ll have to let me stay.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Limburger Loss
THAT NAP WAS just what I needed. I did my best to clean even after that long night had drained me dry in the best ways. By the end, I was lying on the ground blowing the dirt into the dustpan. Convincing myself that my mother wouldn’t know if I slipped off to catch some sleep, I locked the shop and returned to my uncle’s old apartment.
“It’s not so bad.” After the deep cleaning, new linens, and actual food in the fridge, the place looks good. Livable. Though it could use an actual door for the bathroom.
Stretching to get out all the kinks, I crane my gaze up to the old picture of the guys above the door. “I understand why you stayed here, uncle. Even if it’s just a shoebox, it’s hard to miss out on those long nights with them. It’s hard to leave them.” I try to pull the frame off of the wall, but my tiny reach doesn’t do much beyond knocking it off kilter.
So much for that dramatic monologue. I have to settle for leaning against the door and lightly brushing my finger over their feet. “I promised you three months and, I don’t know how, but I’m going to get you them. I swear.”
I’ve got a few hours until the guys return. Plenty of time to finish cleaning, maybe whip together another fondue, and we can get to brainstorming how to convince my mother she belongs back home. And I belong here.
Whistling to myself, I swing around my massive ring of keys and lock the apartment. There’s a commotion outside from the rumble of large trucks idling on the street. I spot a few garbage men in the alley standing around the dumpster. After I slide down the ladder, I greet them with a cheery, “Hello.”
They both hurl pieces of broken wood into the dumpster, then look back at me. One tips his head and the other smiles.So much for dangerous men lurking in back alleys, Mom.I bet they wouldn’t even know what to do with my kidney if I gave it to them.
I shake off the idea of using that against my mother. My…
Mom?
