Page 69 of Welcome Home for Christmas
Oh, God. Was her mother right this time, too?
“I’m a cop, so I thought handcuffs would also remind you of me.” He chuckled. “It’s stupid, probably.” He reached for her waist and tugged gently, but she stood rooted to the ground beneath her feet. Frozen.
Her heart was beating painfully now. She blinked back tears, swallowing the lump of emotion rising in her throat. “Troy,” she said, shaking her head as everything came into perfect focus. “This thing between you and me can’t possibly last.”
His smile faltered as she met his beautiful brown eyes. Eyes that she’d wanted to spend more time staring into.
“What?”
“You and I are two different people,” she said numbly.
“Who complement each other perfectly.”
“But for how long?” she asked. “Until you grow restless again? Until it stops being a good time?” She hated the look on his face as he listened to her. She hated herself a little bit for believing what her mother had told her. But the gift he’d given her spoke volumes. She couldn’t continue to live in her fantasy world that she and Troy might be the real thing. And she wasn’t willing to have her heart broken again.
“Allison, don’t do this,” Troy said.
A single tear slid down her cheek and she wiped it away quickly. “Thank you for the gift.”
“No, no, no. I’m not ready for this thing between us to end,” he told her. “I want to see where it goes between us.”
“It’s not going anywhere,” she said, her voice cracking. “This is where it stops, Troy.”
“Your mother said something last night, didn’t she? I could tell by the way you were after I came in from helping your stepdad. What did she say?” Anger laced his voice now.
“This is my decision,” she said. “No one else’s but mine.”
He stared at her. The twinkle in his eyes was gone. “You know what? You’re right. You are a grown woman, Allison. This is your decision. Choose me.”
She met his gaze and wanted so badly to choose him. So badly. “You told me last night that I needed to start thinking about myself,” she said through her tears. “That I needed to stop doing what everybody else wanted me to, stop caring about what everybody else wanted, and to think about what I needed. Well, I need to guard my heart. This is me grabbing the oxygen mask and making sure that I survive. I don’t think that I can survive losing you. Not if we continue on the path we’re on.”
He reached for one of her hands. “But what if that path leads to something wonderful? Amazing? Do you really want to walk away from what might happen between us?”
She shook her head as more tears washed over her cheeks. “I have to. Good-bye, Troy,” she said. “Merry Christmas.”
“Allison,” he called, as she turned her back and headed toward her front door. He didn’t follow her. He only called her name one more time and then she opened her door and closed it behind her, clutching his gift in her hands. She didn’t want it. All she’d wanted for Christmas was Troy, the one thing she couldn’t allow herself to have.
