Page 68 of Welcome Home, Cowboy
Damn.
“Captain Phillips.” The commander’s steps quickened until he was standing right in front of Lawson. “What are you doing here? I thought we were still giving you time to lick your wounds.”
Biting back the sting of that comment, Lawson forced a smile. “I thought you just needed someone to push papers for a while. Give the other paper-pushers a break.” He laughed even though he didn’t see anything funny right now.
Commander Oakes shook his head. “No. You’re too valuable to keep behind a desk. You’re one of the best pilots we have on this base. Your record is clean, aside from that accident last year. That wasn’t your fault, though, Captain.”
Lawson nodded. Not his fault. He knew that, but it didn’t keep him from feeling guilty about it. That wasn’t something they’d taught in flight school—Guilt 101: How not to let it devour you.
Commander Oakes stared at him. “Are you still doing that yoga thing down at the Veterans’ Center? The one that’s supposed to be helping with your stress?”
Lawson looked up. Stress got elevated to PTSD in some minds, and that diagnosis had killed his buddy’s career. “I am doing the yoga, sir. Dr. Pierce recommended it. And the instructor isn’t bad to look at, so…”
This made the commander laugh. “I see. How are your visits with Dr. Pierce going? You ready to fly again?”
Lawson’s gaze flicked down the hall where the flight simulator loomed. As if reading his mind, Commander Oakes nodded. “Light duty is temporary, but there’s no shame in asking for reassignment. A lot of pilots go on to instruct on the base in Camp Neally. I happen to know that Major Pete is retiring and—”
Lawson shook his head. “I’m a pilot, sir. I’m fine and, frankly, I’m tired of pushing papers. Of course I’m ready to get back in the sky.”
Oakes studied him for a long moment. “Good. I’ll see to it that we get you back in the cockpit then.” He patted a firm hand on Lawson’s back. “We’ll be in touch.”
“Yes, sir.” Lawson expelled a breath as the commander walked away, then headed in the direction of the flight simulator. No time like the present to squash his demons. If he didn’t, he’d be packing his bags for Camp Neally. Nice to visit, but he didn’t want to live there. Being an instructor wasn’t his lifelong dream, either. He was a pilot. He’d worked hard to get here, and he wasn’t about to let anything get in the way.
He stopped at the door to the room, hesitated only momentarily, and then walked inside.
—
Two hours later, Lawson went inside his apartment to take a quick shower before going to pick Julie up. He was drenched in sweat as if he’d just completed a full day of physical training. What he’d done was clutch a fake control system for half an hour. It was meant to simulate the real thing, and it’d done a good job of that.
Today had been progress. Commander Oakes was expecting more from him, though. He pulled on a pair of jeans and a button-down, short-sleeved shirt. He’d go back to the simulator tomorrow and stay a full hour. And the next day, and the day after that, he decided, heading out the door with an unopened bottle of wine in hand. It wasn’t just Beth and Sabrina that he stood to let down if he got reassigned to another base. He had Julie now, too. And no matter how things had started between them, he had no intention of letting her go.
He drove to her home and rang the doorbell.
“Hey there, handsome,” she said, reaching for her purse. She locked up and fell into stride beside him, talking excitedly about something to do with the Veterans’ Center—he couldn’t focus, though. The afternoon had taken all the focus he’d had. He opened the truck door for her, waited until she was inside, and then walked around to the driver’s side. He was going through the motions. That was as good as he could offer tonight.
“Hard day?” she asked, watching him. He could feel the weight of her stare beside him.
“You could say so.”
“Want to talk about it?”
He glanced over. No part of him wanted to talk about it. “I, uh, got in a flight simulator today,” he said despite himself.
Julie sucked in an audible breath. “How’d it go?”
He shook his head. “I’m still alive. Baby steps.” He decided to leave out the part about running into Commander Oakes, and his comment about being transferred if he wasn’t ready to fly just yet. There was no reason to worry her with that tidbit of information because he’d do whatever it took to make sure that didn’t happen.
She reached for his hand and squeezed. “Thanks for telling me.”
She could thank Dr. Pierce for that. The good doc said he needed to start opening up to someone if he wanted to get better. And he did. He could see things working out really well with Julie if they continued the way they were.
He parked in front of Kat and Micah’s house and looked over. “Thanks for being my date tonight. It’s pretty weird that I’m dating my best friend’s sister-in-law. Micah and Ben have always been like family to me.”
“Tonight’ll be fun.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Let’s go inside.”
—
Julie couldn’t help the smile on her face. All of her favorite people were sitting around the same table. She could get used to this.
