Page 58 of Sweet Vengeance
I can’t take my eyes off him, my gaze’s magnetized to him. Ollie looks up at me through hooded brown eyes that are both unsure and frenzied, like he knows what he wants but is afraid he shouldn’t.
“That’s it. You feel so good. I’ve been thinking about youall day. I can’t get you out of my mind.” I’m not lying to him. Even when my thoughts were all entangled with my father, they were on Ollie too. I don’t know how he’s done it, but he has his hooks in me, has me on a fucking leash, even though he doesn’t know it. I never thought anyone would be able to collar me.
I fuck into his mouth slightly and he takes it, digs his nails into my thighs, every movement he makes still fast and hungry. My balls are already so damn full, it’s killing me not to unleash, but I’m also dying to kiss him again. I want to make him come too, want to swallow every sound he makes when he orgasms.
“Come here.” I pull him up, and Ollie nearly scrambles back down toward my cock again. “You can suck it again in a minute. I wanna feel you too.”
He leans back and looks at me. I can’t make myself meet his gaze, afraid of what he might see in mine, afraid of what is there. I’m too raw to hide anything at the moment.
I pull his shirt over his head, then tug him to his feet. Ollie goes easily, almost like he would follow me anywhere, and maybe he would. He’s here with me, after all.
He lets me strip him out of his clothes, his dick swollen and hard, veins decorating his pale skin like a painting. I wrap my hand around it and stroke, then ease back on the bed. “I want to try something. I want to rub off on each other. What do you think would be better for you? Top or bottom? If you think neither is good for your ribs, then we can—”
“Top,” he cuts me off eagerly.
“God, I love your enthusiasm for sex with me.” I lie back, my head on the pillows, taking Ollie’s hand and pulling him with me. “Tell me if anything hurts.”
“I’m fine. I’m getting better, Cillian.”
“I like it when you say my name.”
“Cillian.” He leans down and kisses me. “Cillian.” Another kiss. “It’s like you turn me into someone else…Cillian.”
I grab the back of his head, holding him close so I can ravage his mouth with my tongue. We rut together, cock against cock, rubbing off like our bodies need each other. Is it like this for him too? I’ve never doubted myself as much as I do with him because everything feels so fucking new.
“Come on, dirty boy. Take what you need from me,” I tell him as I kiss his throat.
Ollie’s movements on top of me become faster, his thrusting more intense, needy little sounds pulling from the back of his throat that make my head spin and turn me on even more.
Who would have thought that rubbing dicks together could feel this good? I swear I feel like I’m going to drown in this moment, and I’ll go under willingly.
“Oh…I’m…” His eyes roll back, his movements becoming jerkier. I tug Ollie’s head down again, taking his mouth so I can swallow down the sounds of his orgasm. His whole body vibrates against me as I feel the warm splash of his cum against my skin.
I swear I feel like he’s mumbling my name into my mouth, and I hate that I can’t hear it, but I don’t want to stop kissing him either.
Ollie continues to thrust against me, spilling between us with each forward movement, his tongue caressing mine, and something about knowing how much pleasure he’s taking from me sends me careening over the edge. I lose myself to the orgasm, to the pleasure of Ollie, my cum joining his, rubbing into our skin as we don’t stop moving or kissing, though it becomes slower and slower, until Ollie stills on top of me, his head against my chest.
“You good? None of that hurt you?” I ask, running my fingers through his hair.
He doesn’t answer right away, and for a moment, I worry I broke him—or that I misread the situation and he didn’t want to do what we just did. Maybe he changed his mind and I didn’t realize? Christ, I would kill myself if I hurt him that way.
Just as I’m about to ask him what’s wrong, Ollie says, “You’re sweeter than you realize.”
A loud laugh bursts from my mouth. I don’t want him to feel like I’m making fun of him, but I can’t help it. There’s absolutely nothing sweet about me.
“I’m being serious. Don’t laugh at me.” He tries to pull away, but I wrap my arms around him, holding him in a way that should feel completely unfamiliar to me but somehow doesn’t.
“It’s cute you think I’m sweet. I don’t typically have people say things like that about me.” I sober. “I’m not who you think I am if that’s what you see.”
“You don’t get to tell me how to feel, Cillian. Maybe you’re in control of a lot in your life, but not that. My feelings are mine.”
I can almost believe him when he says things like that to me, when he looks at me all intense and passionate, confident in who he is and how he thinks, though I don’t believe he sees how confident he is, and…if there are parts I see in Ollie that he doesn’t see in himself, maybe that means there really can be pieces of me he knows are there that I can’t find.
No. What the fuck is wrong with me? I can’t start thinking like that. I’m the guy who is going to kill for him, despite knowing he doesn’t want me to. While I see honor in that—except for the lying—he doesn’t. “Fine, Kitten. Your feelings are yours. I just don’t want you to get hurt when you realize I’m not who you want.”
“I learn more about who you are every day, and there’smore than you see,” he insists.
I roll my eyes. “Can we not do this? I don’t want to argue, and I’m not going to agree with you about this.”
