Page 85 of Sweet Vengeance
“Fuck me. Please fuck me, Cillian.” He grabs my hips, but then it’s me pushing back against him, me taking all the cock I need from him. I cry out when he’s buried deep, then ease forward and shove back again.
“That’s it. Ride my cock. Take what you need from me, because giving you what you need, that gives me what I need too.”
I’m delirious in my desire for him, but I don’t care, don’t want to care, and don’t want it to ever go away. I fuck myself on Cillian’s dick, pleasure us both with my body.
“You always fucking know what I need from you…this, your hunger for me, it fills me up, makes all those empty spaces inside me disappear.”
His words make my head spin, making me take him harder, faster, find the spot where Cillian hits me just right. Every time his dick brushes over my prostate, I think I’m going to lose control, that I’m going to come.
“Please,” I beg.
“You need my load so you can come? I know how much you like me to breed you, like your hole wrecked and leaking my cum.”
I do. God, I do. This is a part of me too. I can be more than one thing. All these parts of me, even the ones Cillian introduced me to, are real and true and finally free.
Light dances in my vision, an explosion of color. Cillian is moving now, fucking me. It’s exactly what I need. “Come in me. Breed me.”
His cock twitches inside me, his grip on my hips tightening. The second the first spurt of cum shoots from his balls and into me, I lose control, I’m falling, diving into my orgasm, the room spinning as I shoot, hands-free. Cillian took my body, yes, but it’s what he does in my head that is so potent, so intense, that he can make me do this.
He keeps filling me, and I keep coming until I realize my body gave out and Cillian is holding me up.
“God, I’m so fucking in love with you,” he says into my hair, his soft cock slipping from my ass.
“I’m so in love with you too.”
We don’t talk, just stand there catching our breath for a moment. Cillian collects our things, and we wordlessly go upstairs to our room. We shower together, and though it’s early, we climb into bed, my mouth finding his cock and his fingers settling in my hair. Every time he starts to get hard again, I ease off. That’s not what this is about. He just pets me, and I take comfort in being between his legs.
“I want this, just as much as you. I love having you like this.” He tickles his fingers over my cheek. “I don’t want you to think the cockwarming is only for you because it’s for me too.”
I nod because somehow, I know.
I can’t say how long I stay like that, but eventually my jaw hurts and I crave speaking to him too. I lie against his chest, looking down at him. “Thank you for today. No one has ever treated me the way you do. Thank you for playing for me.”
“I did that because of you. You gave me that back.” He kisses me, and then I lay my cheek against his pec, Cillian’s arm around me, stroking my back.
“I told my dad about you—that I’m in love with a man named Cillian. That we’re together.”
I’m surprised when he tenses beneath me. “He’ll want someone better for you, and he’ll be right. I’m not who he’s going to want you with, Kitten.”
“He wants me happy, and that means he wants me with you. He asked me if I was happy, and I said yes. He asked if you’re good to me, and I had the same answer.” It’s deeper than that, but ultimately, that’s all anyone can hope for with someone they love.
“I killed them…the people who hurt you. I took my vengeance for what they did. I get that you don’t want to hear what I do, but I can’t keep going with that between us.”
I wait for the shock to come…but it doesn’t. I wait for the anger, but again, it never arrives…because I knew. How could I not? I tried to ignore it, tried to pretend it didn’t exist, but I always knew he would kill them, and when he eased up on his protectiveness after their big night out, I’d have to be an idiot not to understand what that meant.
Cillian killed for me.
I don’t want anyone to die, but they hurt people. They would have killed that man had I not shown up, and they would have killed me too. We can pretend all we want that life is right or wrong, black or white, but the truth is, we live in the gray—Cillian and the mini mob more than the rest of us, but we all live there too.
I know that’s wrong, know the things he does are wrong, but I know how good he can be too, how good he is in other ways and right or wrong, for me, that’s enough.
“Say something. You’re killing me here.”
“I know,” I answer simply. “What does it mean about me that I’m partly relieved?”
“It means you’re smart, that you’ll protect yourself. It means you don’t want people out there who will hurt others. It means you’re glad no one else will have to go through what you did, at least by them. We don’t always do what we do for the right reasons, but this time we did. This time, what we did will protect others and it will protect you.”
“What if you get arrested for it?”
