Page 137 of Ice Darling
She jerks the door open, cutting me off. “I’ll go out first. Wait at least a couple minutes until you leave too.”
Just like that, she slips out of the room. I stare at the wall and run a rough hand through my hair, gritting my teeth as I sort through my thoughts.
I was mostly unbothered when my teammates were teasing me about Miss Potts. So why does it annoy me so much now that Cordelia thinks I’m interested in Gordie’s teacher too?
Why do I want to drag her back into my room and kiss her until that ridiculous suspicion is banished from her head?
I’ve known for a while that I find Cordelia attractive and intriguing. Whenever she walks into the room, my attention always seems to find her. From the moment she looped her hand around mine in the stadium, she left an impression that I just couldn’t shake.
At first, I thought I kept thinking about her because of the guilt I felt for shrugging her off. Then I figured I felt such a strong connection with her because she has a close bond with my daughter.
But after today, I don’t think I can hide behind those excuses anymore.
There’s something about Cordelia Davenport that calls to me. She awakens parts of me I thought were dead. I’ve done my best to squash it. Ignore it. Rationalize it. And pretend that it’s something else.
And now, I’ve reached the tipping point of every objection.
In accounting, balancing the books comes with a rigorous set of systems and processes. If the accounts are off by a mere cent, it all has to be re-counted.
Numbers don’t lie.
And the numbers in my heart add up to only one thing.
I have feelings for Cordelia Davenport.
Now, what am I going to do about that?
Chapter Forty-Five
Cordelia
I find an excuse to leave the arcade early.
It’s too much: Renthrow’s heavy stares and the way they make my heart lurch; Gordie’s innocent little looks in my direction; the way I so badly want to take care of her but feel so inadequate; Miss Potts fitting so perfectly into their little family.
My head starts to hurt, so I tell Gordie I’m leaving. I watch her closely, checking to make sure that my sudden exit won’t cause her harm. But thankfully, she’s having too much fun with Miss Potts to have an episode.
I’m not salty.
It’s totally fine that she’s happy with Miss Potts.
Being mad at that would be immature.
As immature as my desire to grab Miss Potts by her perfect hair and tell her to back off. That Renthrow and Gordie are mine.
Nothing I’m doing makes sense, and evenI’mgetting annoyed with myself.
One minute, I want to avoid Viking Renthrow with my every breath. The next, I want to hover around him and Gordie like a shipwrecked survivor to a campfire.
The back-and-forth is killing me, but one thing is clear. Renthrow and I can’t go any further. He thinks I’m a better person than I am, and I can’t let him find out the truth. Now that Gordie means so much to me, now that I want to protect her with everything I have, I really need to be careful.
You’re a curse to everyone around you, Delia.
Those words echo in the darkest corners of my heart.
They’re true.
Gwen proved it.
