Page 140 of Ice Darling
April pulls her lips into her mouth and watches me like the waveform lines on her diagnostic scanner. “There’s something else, isn’t there? Something you haven’t mentioned yet.”
Rebel touches my arm. “Does it have anything to do with your twin?”
I suck in a sharp breath.
April speaks cautiously. “We weren’t snooping or anything. The nursing-home group chat shared an article of you—well, someone who lookedexactlylike you in a pageant. We were really stunned and looked into it…but… Cordelia, are you okay?”
The knifing sensation is back. A memory of the awful words I said to Gwen the last time we spoke fills my head.
“My life would be so much better if I were just me and not a twin.”
I step away from the two ladies who feel more like friends than bosses. “You two can finish that. I’m not hungry anymore.”
Rebel and April watch me as I return to my section of the outdoor garage. I hear them whispering among themselves, and it seems like April wants to come over and talk. I’m secretly relieved when Rebel shakes her head and they allow me to work without asking any more questions.
What would I say?
“I basically told my sister I wish she were dead, and then she died, and it was too late to apologize for it. So should we head to the Tuna? I’m paying.”
I don’t deserve good things like friends and family and love. Those things were meant for Gwen. She wasmadeto be loved and give love in return. To be warm and receive warmth.
I was nothing but hatred and spite. Resentment and bitterness.
I iced her out, and if that wasn’t enough, I crushed her to pieces.
At least, the last thing I said to her was half-right.
Life would have been much better if we weren’t born as twins. Except,I’mthe twin who shouldn’t have made it out.
Chapter Forty-Six
Sasha: Everything’s ready on my end. Oh, I can’t wait until we can meet up in person instead of over text.
Brenda: I can’t wait either! And not a moment too soon! Things are very strange with the kids.
Sasha: What do you mean? I thought things were going well since the last time we spoke? I even called Brennon back to the city.
Brenda: That was you?
Sasha: Yup. Now that Brennon’s gone, there’s nothing in their way.
Brenda: Nothing but themselves apparently.
Sasha: What do you mean?
Brenda: Viking is cooking breakfast for your daughter…
Sasha: ARE THEY THAT SERIOUS!? IS SHE SLEEPING OVER ALREADY?
Brenda: No, no. Nothing like that. He’s packing an extra lunch box for her.
Sasha: Packing a…what?
Brenda: A lunch box. My son cooks amazingly well and packs Gordie’s lunches every day.
Sasha: That’s so sweet. But it’s not aggressive enough.
Brenda: What would you like him to do, Sasha? Back her up against a wall and declare his undying love?
