Page 26 of The Biker and the Gamer
“Okay. What I want you to do right now is count to ten,slowly.” She gets up and rounds the desk, coming to sit in the armchair next to mine. Her palm settles gently on my shoulder and I do as she suggests, counting to ten slow and steadily.
“Now, close your eyes and let’s take some deep breaths together.”
Following her lead, I take deep breaths in and out for the next five minutes. It helps some. My heart rate is almost back to its normal pace.
“I think you’re having an anxiety attack,” she tells me. “For most people, anxiety’s chronic, a war they fight every day. But this is the first time you’ve had one since the burglary incident—in fact, those were full-blown panic attacks you used to have. So what this tells me is that there’s something in particular from which your anxiety is stemming. Do you think you might be able to pinpoint what that is?”
I think on it for all of two seconds before I blurt out, “Him.”
“Okay,” she says slowly. “Who’s him?”
“Alec.”
“Alec Vaughn? The gamer?”
“Yeah.”
“What happened?” she demands, protectiveness rising in her tone. “Did he do something to you?”
“No.”
A long pause. “Are you two dating?”
“No.”
“One-night stand?”
“No.”
“You argued?”
“No, I—I don’t…” I trail off, frustrated with whatever the hell is going on with me. Why do feel like this? “I…I think I’m falling for him. When he looks at me, I’m…I’m justgone. Strangest thing. It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. He has these eyes that just—just pry me open and scoop my soul out.”
A long pause. “Are these feelings requited?”
I look down at my hands and shrug. “Don’t think so. I know he’s got some weird fascination with me—hence our deal—but other than that…no.”
“There’s no way to know for sure without talking to him about how you feel, Kenny.”
“His ex-girlfriend is a physicist,” I tell her. “He called her ‘witty andgenius’. I’m not even genial. I’m a bitchy pessimist with a murky past and a criminal record. Trust me, the feelings aren’t mutual. Can’t see how a guy like him would go from a genius physicist to a chick who works in an auto repair shop and has a weed addiction.”
“First of all,” Toni starts admonishingly, “stop thinking so negatively of yourself. From what I hear, The Metal Shop is the number one auto repair shop in Denver because ofyou. You’re your own brand of genius. Second, my ex-husband was a mogul and a business mastermind who could take five dollars and turn it into five million. And who’s the love of my life now?” She gives me a look. “A felon and ex-biker who’s twelve years my junior. And let me tell you something, Nero never once doubted himself or worried that he wasn’t good enough for me. He’s got a past murkier than yours, but I’ve never met anyone more confident in themselves than Nero Gunnar.”
Reaching over, she takes my hand and squeezes. “It’s not about who or what his ex is, it’s about whoyouare.”
I take in a deep breath. Toni always knew how to talk me down from a ledge. “Thing is, he’s notmytype either.”
She arches a brow. “Didn’t I overhear you telling Nero the other day that you’ve spent the last year craving something different?” She leans in and grins at me with her pearly white teeth, her eyes twinkling. “Well, here’s your ‘different’.Go for it.”
Kendra
I’m hooked onJane the Virgin.
Leyana got me into it. It’s dramatic and over-the-top and I always swear I’m never watching another episode. But every time she knocks on my door with a tray of tacos and asks, “Jane the Virgin?”, I find myself elbow-deep in tasty food and back-to-back episodes of histrionic hilarity.
“Petra is the only character I can stand in this thing,” I grumble, rolling eyes for the umpteenth time, though still unable to take them off the TV.
“The real Petra, or her evil twin?” Leyana asks from where she’s curled up on my couch, crunching on potato chips.
