Page 102 of The True Garza
“You can’t hurt me if I already know what this is. Get over yourself.”
Lies, lies. At this point in my life, he’s probably the only one with the power to rip my heart out. Why did it have to behimwith that power? Someone who can commit to literally nothing. Why did my body choosehimto give total submission and permission?
Jerking my head, I attempt to free my chin from his grasp, but he doesn’t let go. Instead, he lowers his lips to mine and kisses me so softly it makes my heart melt. This kiss feels like an apology. Like a whisper to my soul. Like a plea for forgiveness of sins yet to be committed. It’s as gentle as feathers dusted against silk.
And I could weep right now, for wanting more from him. For wanting things I know he can’t give. I want him to bemine, as true and wholly asI’mhis.
Dear Heart, why must you so desperately want what you can’t have?
“Kids, I’m home! Is everybody decent?”
Brook’s voice breaks us apart. And, dammit, now I don’t want him to leave. I want him to stay with me and kiss me and hug me and make me laugh. This feeling in my chest is awful.
Clearing my throat, I take a step back. “Brook can see you out.” Another step back. “I’m gonna get some rest.” Another step, and then another, until I’m in my room. “Call me when you wanna hook up.” Swiftly, I shut the door and turn the lock, then collapse against it.
I really should just end things right now. Why do I do this to myself? Why continue this thing when I know hookups won’t be enough?
My phone pings on the dresser. I go over and pick it up.
Dennis: Hey you. How was your day? Not too stressful, I hope?
I smile at the screen.
When I got home on Sunday, instead of a text from True, I’d gotten one from Dennis, Jules’s hot contractor friend. I’d initially ignored it. But Monday was my day off and, out of sheer boredom, I replied. We’ve been chatting ever since.
He’s nice enough. A little too serious, which generally doesn’t work for me, becauseI’mtoo serious. Men who know how to let their hair down are usually more appealing to me. I fell for my ex-fiancé because he was like a walking comedian. But I’m giving Dennis’s serious personality a pass for the meantime, at least until I get to know him a bit more.
He wants to meet up, but I haven’t agreed on a date yet, as I’m still waiting for his background check from Marco.
As I amble to the bed, I tap out a reply.
Me:I did a semi-double shift, so I’m more burned out than exhausted.
Dennis: Damn, your feet must be killing you.
Me:Nothing I’m not used to. A day’s rest and I’ll be right as rain.
Dennis: Would you like me to book you a spa day at Jules’s Touch?
Me: Appreciate the offer, but I’m fine, thanks. How was your day?
Dennis: Oh, the usual. Hot scalp under a hardhat, herding lazy workers, fighting with unreliable suppliers, and popping 10 painkillers an hour.
Me: Yikes.*laughing emoji*
Dennis: But hey, hectic days make the rest days so much sweeter.
Me:True that. Can I video call you?
Dennis: Yeah, but give me 2 mins to throw on a shirt. I don’t want you to think I’m a thirsty perv or anything.
Me:I’ll pretend not to look, I promise. *wink emoji*
I’m about to hit the video icon when an email notification comes in from Marco.
The background check. Right on time.
For the next eight minutes, I peruse every detail. No red flags. One yellow flag, but that’s something I’d be fine asking him flat-out about. He knowsmybackground, so he might be expecting me to run a check on him, anyway. But if he isn’t and gets upset that I did, then that’ll be the end of that for me.
