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‘Trust me, Belinda. You’re going to get into a lot more trouble if you don’t. You’re in for manslaughter. This isn’t going to look good, is it?’

It’s the kind of question that doesn’t need answering.

The governor is flicking through my file, which is alarmingly thick. ‘This is the first time you’ve been in prison, isn’t it?’

I nod.

That unwavering gaze returns. ‘Do you know what I think?’

I shake my head numbly.

‘I think you’ve been threatened for something, that you may or may not have done. Maybe someone asked you to hide a phone or drugs. Or perhaps you’ve refused to share your food with another prisoner. These are the sort of things that provoke fights. Might I be right?’

The lump in my throat feels so big that I’m unable to swallow. So I nod again instead.

‘I thought so. Do you want to tell me more details?’

And risk another attack? I shake my head.

‘Are you scared of what might happen if you do?’

Another nod.

‘I could send you to Solitary for not cooperating, you know.’

Better that, I tell myself,than Jac or one of her friends killing me for splitting.

‘But I don’t see how that would help,’ the governor muses, as if having a conversation with herself. ‘However, I need you to write a full statement about what happened.’

‘I’ve already said,’ I whisper. ‘It was an accident.’

Her grey eyes narrow. ‘You wouldn’t believe how often people say that, Belinda. Please listen to me very carefully. If you’re being threatened, you need to tell one of the guards before anything happens again. And if you’re not being threatened, and you did deliberately mean to hurt that woman, then you should know that I will be watching you. Is that clear?’

I nod. There’s something I have to ask but the words stickin my throat through fear of the answer. ‘Is she … is that woman …’

‘Are you asking if she’s all right?’

I nod.

‘She’s alive and she can still see. But she’s got third-degree burns and is in intensive care. The likelihood is that she’ll be scarred for the rest of her life.’

I feel myself wincing.

‘I can tell this is an entirely new world for you,’ says the governor in a softer tone than before. ‘Just be careful who you befriend, Belinda. Very careful.’

28

When I return to my wing, it’s ‘association time’, which is prison talk for leisure time. A group of women are huddled round a television, watching a series in which couples agree to marry each other before even meeting. Most of these women are in what I think of as friendship gangs, but I haven’t been included (not that I’d want to be) so I take a seat on the outside of the ring.

‘You silly bitch,’ squeals the young girl opposite my cell. ‘Don’t do it!’

‘Are you kidding,’ squeaks another. ‘He’s a hunk. I’d give him bed-space any day.’

I walk as fast as I can, but Jac steps out and pushes me against the wall. There’s no sign of an officer.

‘Did you tell the governor about the coke in the sheets?’ she snarls.

‘No.’