Page 20 of Catch of a Lifetime
“No?”
“No.”
“Hold your hand out straight and show me.”
I sat on my trembling hands and glared at him instead.
Jerry grunted, and sipped his own tea.
“Thanks.” I nudged his ankle with my foot.
“Said that already.”
“I mean for dropping whatever it was you were doing when I called to come over. For going to get the quad bike. For helping me get him to safety. Thank you.”
He brushed a scatter of Hobnob crumbs out of his beard and said, “Bet you’re going to let me keep my new quad bike up here now, huh?”
“Yes. I’ll buy it for you and build you your own little shed, too.”
His mug froze halfway to his lips. “I was joking.”
“I’m not.” I shrugged. “You want a quad bike? Buy one, and send me the bill.”
“Don’t be daft.”
“Where do you want me to build the shed? Here? Your back garden? Let me know.”
Technically, I could afford to buy him a new house for his new quad bike to live in, but while Jerry knew I had some money set aside, he didn’t know how much. In general, I didn’t like to talk about it.
I’d earned a lot of money in my regrettable former life as a hedge fund manager in the City, and my family had money that would make its way to me in the fulness of time. I didn’t reallysee it as mine in any functional way. I considered myself more of a temporary guardian than anything else.
I wasn’t a big spender. I had my house how I liked it, and would only buy a new car when my current one couldn’t be fixed. I lived in cargoes and anoraks or shorts and hoodies when I was outside; sweatpants and jumpers and thick socks when I was inside. I wasn’t interested in big, flashy holidays. If I had a hankering for some winter sun, I went to stay with Grandpa and Art in Kos.
I still worked on my investment portfolio, but even that wasn’t for me. I was tending it for the intellectual challenge, but mostly because I had plans for when it was my turn to pass it on.
More than a few charities were going to have a really good day when my number came up.
“You can’t—” Jerry started.
“I can and I will. You want it, say the word. You’re always there for me, Jerry.” And I was never there for him, not in any way I could see.
Jerry blinked at me in astonishment. “Huh. Well, now. Never thought I’d get me a sugar daddy.”
I scowled. “I’m not your sugar daddy.”
“In that case, I never thought I’d get me a sugar baby.”
“What? I’m not your sugar baby, either.”
“You’re younger than me, aren’t you?”
“No, it’s…that’s not how it works. It doesn’t actually have anything to do with age. If I was your sugar baby, you’d be buying me the quad bike. Since I’m the one buying the expensive gifts, it meansyou’rethe sugar baby.”
He squinted. “What?”
“In this scenario, you’re my sugar baby. I’m your daddy. That’s in general the way it goes. I shower you with gifts and in return, you…”
“Go on,” he said, plonking his elbows on the table and his chin in his hands. “What do I do?”
