Page 31 of Make You Mine This Christmas
My body is stiff from moving so little in my sleep last night. I blink against the bright light coming through the blinds. For the second day in a row, it’s much later than I usually start the day. I wonder if I can replicate anything else for the second day in a row?
The thought has me sitting up in bed, ready to go searching for my caretaker. My lips turn up when I remember how he feathered the softest kiss on my forehead. My smile grows when I spot the suit I haphazardly left lying on the floor in the haze of pain hanging in the closet. That man doesn’t give himself enough credit for how thoughtful he is.
Speaking of which, I pull my hand away from stretching out my back to find it covered in chocolate. A glance behind me finds melted chocolate all over the sheets, too. Well, guess laundry needs to be on the docket for this morning too.
Standing slowly, the medicine sometimes having a woozy aftereffect, I gather my bearings and then strip the bed. The scent of freshly brewed coffee wafts in from the kitchen, and my stomach growls. I haven’t had anything to eat since lunchtime yesterday, which may have contributed to how bad the headache got once it started and definitely explains how hungry I am now.
With sheets in hand, I head to the kitchen expecting to find Austin on the couch or at the table. I don’t find him in either place, but continue my path to the washing machine to get the sheets started. Cup of coffee poured, I take a sip before listening to the quiet of the apartment. Both of the doors to his bedroom and the bathroom are open—where is he? On my way to investigate, a piece of paper on the table catches my eye. A few steps closer and I recognize Austin’s handwriting and his car keys.
I read the note quickly, a twisting feeling in my gut. He’s right on when he knew I’d worry to wake up and find him not here. I also can’t help but notice he didn’t say everything would be okay.
A quick check of the clock shows it’s almost ten. I don’t want to cut it close two days in a row. The faster I get ready and get to the gym, the sooner I’ll see Austin and get a read on where his head’s at. A few deep breaths and positive intentions later, I get into motion.
After a shower and a quick egg scramble, I’m ready to hit the road. It’s been a long time since I’ve been behind the wheel of a car, but traffic is light in the pre-lunch hour, and I make it to the gym faster than I expect. With some time to kill before I go inside, I decide to give my Grandma a call.
“How’s my favorite Santa grandson?” she answers in lieu of a greeting.
“Last I checked, I’m your only grandson, let alone the only grandchild who plays Santa.”
“Psh, don’t sass me, boy. And since you asked, I’m fine. The cold spell last week brought out the ache in my hip, but nothing a little hot water bottle and that nice masseuse from the spa can’t fix.” I shake my head even though she can’t see me, knowing a request to not overshare would be met with even more details. To think I almost missed out on what’s become one of the most important relationships in my life.
“Sorry, Grams. I’m okay. Things are good here. We’ve been able to connect with a lot of new families, and we’re going to make some really great Christmases happen for these folks.”
She claps her hands, letting me know I’m on speaker. Now that I know to listen for it, I hear the slow whir of her treadmill. I’m relieved to know her hip really is doing better.
“That’s so wonderful, Brody. I’m so proud of you. And how about that beau of yours?”
If you had told me when I moved to NYC and reconnected with the grandma, who’d been absent most of my life, that ten years later she’d be my closest confidante, I wouldn’t have believed you. “He’s not my beau, Grams.” I ignore thepshnoise she makes and keep going. “But I did need to move in with him because the pipes burst in the place I was staying.”
The sound of her hand slamming on the emergency stop button rings through the receiver. “Why are you letting me talk about my hip like some old woman when you’ve been holding out on real news?”
I laugh. “I don’t know. He’s still pretty wary of trusting me. I told him what happened and why I left—and I think I’ve managed to convince him it’s not because I’ve ever been in any way ashamed of him.”
“Well, does he know the rest?” My silence answers for me. “Brody Alexander Walker. Why you left is important to who you were, but what happened four years ago is who youare.You can’t expect him to let you in if he doesn’t know the true heart of you.”
She’s right. I know she is. “I’ll... I’ll try to tell him tonight.”
“Do better than try, young man. And be sure to let me know when you’ll be back in town for our next dinner and if I’ll need to set a third place for your young man.”
My heart aches, both in missing her, but also at what being back with her for dinners means. When I’m back to my normal life, my time in Winterberry Glen, and with Austin, will be over. She may think there will be a reason for them to meet, but I’m not so sure.
“I will, Grams. I better go get changed for today’s Santa time.”
“Go make some days, Grandson. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
My heart is lighter than it has been in days, and my resolve is stronger too. Whether Austin wants to keep things platonic, or is willing to explore more, he deserves to know me. The me I am now.
I walk into the locker room and find Austin sitting on the bench, hair wet and tights already in place.
“Austin,” I say, surprised he snuck past me in the parking lot.
“I saw you were on the phone, so I didn’t stop to say hi. Everything okay?”
His expression is unreadable. I wish he’d give mesomething.
“I dunno. Is everything okay?”
