Page 39 of Big Pucking Deal
“How about we get you warmed up?” I ask.
“You said you forgive me, but you didn’t say anything about Jordan not beating me to a pulp.”
I scrunch my face and tell him, “That’s because I can’t guarantee it won’t happen. I’ll just pray that it’s over quickly and without too much damage to your beautiful face.”
I get a small, crooked smile out of him and I’ll take that for now. I rise to my feet and hold my hand out to him. He slides his into mine and kisses the back of it before standing. He laces his fingers with mines and squeezes them so tight that they turn white.
I lead him into the warm shower and he lets me take care of him…the way he deserves.
The sun rises and Joaquín still sleeps. I, on the other hand, didn’t get one hour of sleep. I felt like I needed to be on watch in case Jordan came barging in. Like a guard protecting something precious and valuable.
The door creaks open and Brooke’s head pops in. Her jaw drops and her eyes look like big blue balloons. I bring my finger to my mouth, hushing her, and slide out from under Joaquín’s tight hold. I tiptoe out of the room and carefully close the door.
“What’s going on?” She whisper shouts. “Shh. Come with me.”
We walk into the kitchen where Jordan stands, pulling random mugs from the cabinet and placing them in an empty box.
“Put those away, Jordan. You’re not going anywhere and neither am I.”
His head pops up like a jack-in-the-box. “Why not?”
I take a seat on a barstool and pull my legs up. “Because we’re staying here, with each other and with Joaquín.”
“I’m not staying here with that asshole. I want to be gone by the time he comes home.”
“Hate to break it to ya, but he’s already home,” Brooke tells him.
“Excuse me?” In front of my very own eyes, he rises to what seems like twice his size.
“He came home shortly after you stomped off to bed.” Jordan looks at me with fire in his eyes. “Nothing happened. And I believe him.”
Jordan shakes his head and slams his hands on the counter. “You’ve got to be kidding me. You’re gonna fall for hisplease believe mebullshit?”
“I’m not falling for it, I truly believe him. The only reason he even acted like that is because all he heard was that voice that he wasn’t good enough for someone like me. That he’d never be good enough. And that voice that rang out loud and clear was yours. If anyone should be asking for an apology, it should be you asking him for being such a shitty friend. Why do you think the worst of him Jordan?"
"I've been around him the last two years while you've been gone. I've seen the things he has done and what he's capable of. He is not the one for you. Just look at what happened last night. It'll happen again, Jolie."
My blood burns hot and it takes everything in me not to scream this house down. "Then I guess by your very definition,I should warn Brooke right? You were by his side, benefitting from his status. How many women did you two 'share'? If you can change, so can Joaquìn." His shoulders sag and I see the fight start to leave him. “I’m going back to bed. Please think about how well you really know Joaquìn and if you think he’s capable of doing something like that to not only me, but you. You’re his best friend, Jo. Think long and hard about whether or not he’s your best friend.”
"Wait Jo. Please talk to me some more. I need to understand—"
"There's nothing more to say, Jordan. When you're ready to apologize to me, it better come with an apology for Joaquín. You've hurt both of us. I don't know what is going on with you lately, but this isn't the brother I grew up with."
His eyes grow with shame and I watch the color of his face pale. "I'm sorry, Jo. I…I," he's at a loss of words and can only shrug.
I spin around and march back towards our bedroom and crawl into my cozy nook. I pray that my brother can see how wrong he is and be the Jo to our Jo and Jo like it used to be.
MY BODYtrembles as I stick one leg and then the other into a pair of gray sweats. I yank a Havoc sweatshirt off the hanger and pull it over my head, making my hair stand up on end. I turn around to see Jolie standing at the closet entrance, her shoulder leaning against the doorframe.
“I’m sorry, Bunny,” I tell her again.
She shakes her head and saunters over to me. Her fingers comb through my messy hair and I close my eyes, soaking up every ounce of love Jolie is willing to pour into me.
“I know you are, but we’re done with apologies. We say it, we mean it, and we move on. That’s how forgiveness works. When you love someone, you accept the faults they cannot change and help them learn from their mistakes and vow to do better. Just do better. Okay?”
“Every day. For you, I’ll do better every day.” I frame her face with my hands and kiss the lips of the woman I am not worthy of. “C’mon. We better get judgment day over with. Do you think I should rub vaseline all over my face so his fists slip and don’t leave too much damage?”
Jolie laughs and smacks my chest, then leads me out of the closet.
