Page 1 of Dare You to Run
PROLOGUE
DAGEN - 8 YEARS OLD
Mom’s chestrises and falls and she makes this wheezing sound like she can’t breathe. Her lips are really chapped and grandma said she would rub an ice cube over them. I don’t know what an ice cube will do. Mom and Dad always make me put on chapstick when my lips are chapped.
Daddy is sitting in the chair in the corner of the room while the nurse checks on cords and the machine that is hooked to mommy. The nurse said the tubes send medicine straight into her to help with the pain.
Mommy has cancer and they told me it’s painful, like a bad cut but on the inside. Daddy said she needs special medicine to kill the cancerous cells but the other day, mommy gave me bad news. She told me the medicine they gave her didn’t take the bad cells away and that there is no more that the doctors can do to fix her. She said she’s going to go to Heaven. I cried a lot when she told me.
I really don’t want her to go to Heaven. If she’s with God, then who will be here to take care of me? Daddy said he willalways be here to take care of me and will never leave, but a long time ago, Mommy said she’d always be here for me.
Now she’s leaving.
Grandma comes into the room with a cup full of ice. She takes out a piece and rubs it along mom’s lips. Her eyes are open but they look weird. Like something is in them. I can’t see the color very well and it makes me sad.
“Vaughan,” Grandma says to daddy. “Would you mind calling…him, and tell him it’s time?” She looks at me and I wonder whohimis.
Maybe mommy’s friend that she used to have sleepovers with. But then she got sick and I didn’t see him anymore. He was nice, I guess, but I didn’t like how he told me it was a secret when he and mommy and I went to lunch. I don’t like keeping secrets from daddy, and I was afraid he’d find out and be upset with me.
Daddy stands up and says, “Sure. I’ll go call him in my room.”
Daddy has his own bedroom, like me and mommy. When I asked him why he didn’t sleep with mommy like my other friend’s parents, he said it was because he snores really loud and didn’t want to wake mom. I never heard him snore when he’d let me sleep in his bed, but he said I could sleep through a freight train going through the house.
He walks out and I look at mommy. She has her eyes closed again and she gasps for air. Her eyes pop open and see turns to look at me.
“Baby girl,” she whispers and wiggles her fingers at me.
Her voice sounds scratchy and it seems like it must really hurt. Like that time I got strep throat.
I sit closer to mommy and she holds my hand. Her fingers are cold and really skinny. Her whole body is skinny. Dad says it’s the cancer. It eats all the good parts of her and they can’t fight off the bad guys.
Grandma pushes mom’s hair off of her foreheads and starts to cry.
“Dagen. You know that I love you,” Mommy says, and I nod my head.
Words are kinda tough to say. They feel like they’re stuck in my throat
“I have to go to Heaven soon.” She pauses and sucks in a big gulp of air. “But I want you to remember that I will never be too far away. You can see me in your dreams and talk to me whenever you want. I will always be listening and watching over you.”
She coughs real hard and Grandma gives her an ice cube to suck on.
“Daddy and Grandma and Grandpa will be here to help you and love you and guide you…you’ll never be alone.” Her eyes close for a minute and when she opens them again, they’re full of tears. “You are the greatest gift of my life. The love of my life, and I am so lucky I got to be your mom. Be a good girl. Be tough and be smart and most of all, be brave. It’s going to be tough for a while my sweet girl, but one day you’ll smile again. I love you, Dagen Rayne. You are my heart.”
Big fat tears leak from mommy’s eyes and tears fall from mine, too. I lean down and kiss mommy’s cold hand. My heart hurts real bad, and it feels like it might fall out.
I cry and cry and cry until daddy picks me up in his arms and carries me to his room. We lay on his bed and he hugs me tight.
“Mommy’s friend is having a little visit with her and then we’ll go back in,” he tells me.
I must fall asleep because when I open my eyes again, it’s dark and I’m laying next to mommy. Dad is in his chair, and Grandma and Grandpa are here, too.
Mom is sleeping and she finally looks like she feels a little better. Grandma and Grandpa are crying, but daddy isn’t. Hejust has his head down. Maybe it’s a tough guy thing, like Uncle Hayes told me one time.
We sit in her room for a long time. Daddy has some cartoons on for me and the volume is low. I lay my head on mommy’s hand but she doesn’t move it. All of a sudden, mommy does that wheezing thing again and the nurse comes running in. She touches something on the machine and then looks at Grandma. She flicks a button and then takes the tube out of her hand.
Mommy’s chest moves real fast. “Daddy. She can’t breathe,” I cry.
Daddy gets up from his chair and pulls me into his arms.
