Page 54 of Hellfire & Tinsel
“Is hunky dory a technical term?”
“Don’t get smart with me!” Zorun ripped a battered checklist from the back of his pants and shoved it in front of Kassel’s many eyes. On it was a scale that had been customized from red to green.
It went in order from Bad News Bears to Hunky Dory. Always Look on the Bright Side of Life seemed to be the middling section.
“I… see.”
“I should hope so, eyeballs,” Zorun snapped, taking the paper back and shoving it in his pocket again with a shudder, cursing colorfully under his breath.
“Beau would like it,” Kassel found himself saying without thinking, then froze.
Zorun froze too, eyes slowly making their way over to him, sharp and assessing.
“Beau, huh? You know, you haven’t been quite the same since you got back from your summoning. Do we need to talk about it?”
Kassel began to walk away.
Zorun followed swiftly on his heels. “That certainly convinced me that there isn’t a problem.”
“There isn’t,” Kassel said. “I fulfilled the summoning exactly.”
“Yes, yes. You’re a good little employee of the month, I’m sure Oren will put another plaque up in your honor.”
“There isn’t a plaque anymore.”
“Because your rabid fan club stole it! The new picture wasn’t even up for an hour before I had to replace it. AGAIN. We went through fifty a week when you were gone. The whole of Hell was in mourning!”
The mountain of letters that had been posted under his door and the banners and gifts left for him on his return corroborated that. Kassel hadn’t looked at any of them. He didn’t even feel like hehadcome back. He felt like he’d left a vital part of him up top.
He just couldn’t work out what it was, and it had left him debilitated.
He couldn’t eat. He couldn’t sleep. He walked through his usual routine, went to his workplace, but nothing felt right or the same.
And the person he wanted to ask about it he could no longer reach.
“KASSEL! You’re doing it again!” Zorun yelled at him.
He came back to himself to find he had stopped walking in the middle of the hallway.
“Does human saliva contain magical properties or something? One chaste kiss and you’re gone, just like Luc. It’s disgusting.”
Kassel frowned at him, a few of his eyes twitching.
“Or is it the virgin thing? I know we have that handy little trick that we used to use centuries back—”
Kassel slammed Zorun against the wall, surprised by his own hand on Zorun’s bare chest.
Zorun smirked. “Did I hit a nerve?”
“Don’t talk about him like that.”
“And why is that?” Zorun asked, seeming like he was pressing for something.
Kassel ground his teeth, a swirl of unnamable emotions creating a flurry inside him, whipping into a budding storm. “Just don’t. I’ll only give you one warning.”
“Did someone have a little extra fun on their summons?” Zorun continued to poke. “Is the virgin perhaps not so virginal anymore?”
Kassel grabbed two of Zorun’s four horns and used his grip to propel Zorun’s head back into the wall. Debris fell and Zorun grunted but laughed it off, giving him a booted kick to his chest for good measure.
