Page 77 of Every Sunset
“Yeah. She’s on her way,” I replied as I locked the screen of my cell and pushed it into the pocket of my sweats. I needed to go home to shower and change. I was still wearing the clothes Cat had brought for us the day before, and I knew I smelled pretty rough too.
“Are you going to apologize to her?” Madd asked.
“Don’t start again,” I groaned. It was all I had heard from him for hours since he woke that morning. I’d almost begged the doc to give him some drugs just to knock him out and shut him up, but the doc had instead lowered the pain meds so Madd was well and truly awake. And pissed. So pissed with me.
“She might not even forgive you if you do apologize. You realize that, right? You were a complete and utter bastard with her and Max. I still can’t believe you told her it was her fault!”
“I didn’t say that. I just…I suggested it might be better if we never met them, is all,” I argued, and I knew it was pathetic. Madd just stared me down. “I know, okay? But I thought you were going to die! Again! I was wracked with guilt for failing you again and I just…I needed to vent. Anna was there.”
“That is not an excuse, Logan! She fucking died and you weren’t even there to take care of her. You left her and her kid to manage alone. Max was still terrified when I woke up last night. That’s why he was so pissed with you. He needed you and you fucking failed him, just like you failed Anna. Did you see the state she was in last night, and you didn’t even try to help her? Max had to take care of her!” Madd roared. “Get over this stupid fucking guilt, Logan, before it costs you everything you have in your life. You couldn’t have saved me yesterday, just like you couldn’t have saved me that night in the city. None of it was on you, and none of it was on Anna either. You fucked up, bro. You really, really fucked up and if it costs us Anna and Max, I will never forgive you!”
“Neither will I,” I uttered, more to myself, but Madd heard me.
“Just fix it. Do whatever she needs you to do to show her that you didn’t mean a word of the shit you spouted yesterday, and that you love her as much as you told her you do.”
“I do love her, Madd,” I sighed. I hated myself for the way I had acted the day before, and I couldn’t stop worrying about where Anna and Max had even stayed the night before. They hadn’t been home. I knew that much because the cameras at the gates never once notified me on my cell that anyone arrived there after the FBI finished up earlier in the evening. Was Anna alright? Ididn’t know because I hadn’t even been with her the night before when the doctor had checked her over. I worried about whether she had her meds with her. She couldn’t skip a dose of them. They were too important.
“Then show her that, because I’m pretty sure she was doubting it last night,” Madd pointed out and I knew he was right. I also knew I had some work to do if Anna was ever going to forgive me for how epically I had failed her the day before, and let her and her son down.
CHAPTER 28
ANNA
I saw Logan waiting outside the department we had been directed to from the I.C.U. I was already pissed with him for not bothering to tell us when I texted him, where Maddox had been moved to. I’d been horrified when Max and I walked into the room we’d left Madd in the night before, only to find it completely empty. For one awful minute I’d thought I’d lost him, and Logan hadn’t even bothered to tell me. Thankfully, a nurse who recognized me from the previous night, had calmed me down quickly by explaining Maddox had been moved out of the I.C.U. because he was improving speedily.
Of course, knowing I’d reached out to Logan earlier and he’d mentioned nothing, had only served to fuel Max’s rage, and he had plainly told me the only reason he was staying was to look out for me, He told me he didn’t care about Logan or Madd anymore, but he wasn’t fooling either of us. I knew as well as he did that he was just hurting because of the way Logan had acted the day before.
“Anna.” Logan stood and started towards us the second he saw us.
“Nice work keeping us updated, asshole. Mom freaked when we got to the other room and found it empty, but maybe that’s what you wanted?” Max barked right away. His chest was heavingwith fury as he yelled at Logan, and I had to grab his arm to pull him back, scared he was actually going to hit the man.
“Max!” I cried.
“Fuck. I didn’t think. I’m so sorry, sweetheart. Max’s right. I should have told you they moved Madd,” Logan rushed to apologize. “I’d never hurt your mom knowingly, Max.”
“Then what the fuck do you call what happened yesterday?” Max threw back.
“Okay, that’s enough,” I stepped in and I pushed myself in front of Max, “We all just need to calm down.”
“Madd’s doing much better this morning. The doctors said he’s out of danger, and they think he’ll even be able to go home in the next couple of days. He’s been sat up and eating this morning. I’m so sorry I scared you,” Logan told me more calmly. “You can go in and see him if you want to, but I was hoping we could maybe talk a little first, if that’s okay?”
“About what?” Max demanded before I could utter a word.
“Max! That’s enough now,” I hissed as I grabbed his arm once again and pulled him to my side. “We talked about this. I said I didn’t want you being rude,” I reminded him in a lowered voice.
“I want to apologize, Max, to your mom and to you too. I’d like to talk with the both of you if you’ll give me a few minutes?” Logan requested, and when I looked over to him he looked almost scared that I would deny him. It was hurting me to see him looking so pained, especially on top of how exhausted and pale he was.
“Let’s go and get a coffee,” I suggested. I wanted to try and make sure Logan ate something, and despite Max’s anger, I was eager to hear Logan out. I was desperate for him to give me someexplanation for his behavior the day before, that would allow not just me to forgive and forget, but my son too. More than anything I just wanted things to go back to the way they had been between us all before Callum crawled out from under that jetty and destroyed everything.
There was silence between the three of us as I led the way back down to the café that sat near the main entrance of the hospital. When we walked in things became more awkward as we all looked to each other and tried to decide what happened next. Max was glaring at Logan, his jaw tense and his fists clenched. Logan was trying not to meet his gaze, but it was obvious he could see and likely feel how pissed my son was with him.
“Max, grab a table, honey. You want a coffee?” I asked, desperate to do something to ease the tension.
“No. I’m good, thanks, mom.” With that he finally turned his glare from Logan and went to sit at a table in the back corner of the dreary café. It was pretty empty, the decor white and stark and not a single window in the whole space.
“I’m sorry. He’s just angry and feeling pretty protective after what happened yesterday,” I told Logan as we both walked towards the counter.
“He’s right to be angry with me. I failed you both yesterday. I should have taken care of you guys and I didn’t.”
