Page 53 of Every Sunset
“No!” I cried. “When would I have time to date them?”
“Mom.” Max just stared me down knowingly and I knew I wasn’t fooling him.
“Fine. I like them. We’re not dating, but I…I have feelings for them. Both of them. I tried not to, after everything. I didn’t want to fuck up again, Max, but I just…I can’t seem to stay away from them.”
“Both of them?”
“I know, okay? It’s weird, right? But it just kind of happened,” I explained lamely.
“It’s weird,” Max agreed with a nod. “You with two guys kinda freaks me out.”
“Then I’ll stop it, son. I care for them, but I never want to do anything that will hurt you. You are, and always will be my priority.”
“I didn’t say that, mom. Just take a breath,” he told me as he reversed our roles, wrapping his huge arm around me and pulling me into his side in a half hug. “I don’t want you to stop anything because of me. Logan and Maddox are good, kind, and honest men. They care about you, and they want to protect you. That’s what you deserve. I can learn to live with the three of you being together if it makes you happy. That’s all I want for you. After everything you did to raise me, all of the sacrifices I know you made, and the struggles you faced, I just want you to find happiness and be content. If Logan and Madd can do that, then don’t even think about walking away from them.”
“I’ll think about it,” I agreed with a nod. “Right now we have bigger things to focus on.”
“How could he still be alive, mom?” Max asked, his voice lowering to little more than a whisper.
“We were terrified and high on adrenaline. I was a state. I couldn’t find a pulse on him, but maybe…I don’t know. Maybe his heart was just slow or something? The car didn’t go far after we pushed it. It’s possible, Max. I’m sorry, honey. I fucked up again,” I admitted shakily. I couldn’t seem to stop shaking since Isaw Callum outside the store earlier. I was frozen through to my bones and the constant shivering was vibrating my entire body.
“Please just stop blaming yourself for everything,” Max pleaded as he wrapped his other arm around me and hugged me even tighter against his side. “You didn’t do anything wrong, mom. He did. He was the monster. We just did what we had to, to survive.”
“I just w-want you to be safe,” I pushed out through my tight throat. Tears filled my eyes as I clutched his waist and hugged him too. “I tried so hard to always keep you safe Max, but now…I’m so scared you’ll be hurt in all of this mess.”
“You did it. You kept me safe. I’m here and I’m whole. I’m gonna stay that way too. I kicked this fucker’s ass last time. I’ll do it again if I have to,” he pledged, sounding so much stronger now, but it just terrified me.
“No!” I gasped as I looked up at him. “You have to stay out of this now. Please, Max. I n-never want you to have to do what you did ever again. It…It’s not who you are.”
“I’ll be whoever I need to be to protect you. Can’t you see that yet, mom? I can’t lose you, and I sure as hell will never stand by and watch anyone hurt you. I’m at least twice your size already, and I’m not done growing yet. I think it’s sorta time you stopped trying to shelter me behind you. I don’t even fit there anymore,” he told me with the hint of a smile on his face.
“I’ll never stop,” I told him flatly.
“Then I guess it’s a good thing we have Logan and Madd to back us both up now, huh?” He smiled fully for the first time, and something inside of me uncoiled at the sight of it. “Go and speakto them. Tell them everything. You can trust them. I know you can. We can.”
“I know,” I agreed. Everything was crazy around me, but I knew that to be the truth. Logan and Maddox meant what they said when they promised to keep Max and I safe. I just prayed it wouldn’t get either of them hurt in the process.
***
I found Logan and Maddox in the living room. Someone had lit the log fire, despite it being the middle of summer. The room was lit warmly with several lamps and it looked so inviting. All I wanted to do was lay out on the huge sectional with them both, and lose myself in a movie.
Instead Maddox was sat in one of the armchairs with his laptop open on his knee, staring intently at whatever he had on the screen, while Logan was pacing anxiously back and forth behind the sofa. They looked stressed out and worried, and I hated that I knew it was all on me.
“Hey,” I greeted quietly as I walked in. Instantly they both froze and looked right at me.
“How is he?” Maddox asked.
“Shaken up, but a little better now we’re here. You made him feel he’s safe in the house, so thank you,” I replied as I stood frozen, just inside the doorway.
“He is. You’re both safe in this house. I have an amazing security set up. Logan and I will be alerted if anyone even touches a window or door around the house,” Maddox assured me.
“And to do that they’d have to get past the security and cameras we have set up around the perimeter of the entire property.Maddox has us all covered here when it comes to security,” Logan added, and I just nodded. I didn’t know very much about the brain injury Maddox had been left with after he was attacked, but Logan had mentioned to me that it had made his brother paranoid about safety and security. I guessed that was why they had so many measures in place to protect their home.
“Come and sit down, beautiful. You look wiped out,” Maddox told me as he placed his laptop down on the coffee table, then patted his lap.
I knew I should just take a seat on the sofa and try to maintain the appearance that I wasn’t a complete emotional wreck, but the second Maddox’s eyes met mine, I knew he already saw the turmoil inside of me. He read me so easily. So the pretense all seemed pointless and I found myself hurrying around the sofa to get to him. I just needed him to hold me. I always felt safer when he or Logan held me.
I was barely even before Maddox before he had his hands on my hips and lifted me into his lap. I sat sideways and naturally fell against him, resting the side of my head against his chest, in search of the soothing beat of his heart. Tears slipped down my cheeks as he pulled me even snugger against his front and wrapped his arms tightly around me, resting his chin on the top of my head.
