Page 51 of Pages of My Heart
Thomas looks at him in surprised. This is the last thing he was expecting tonight. “Won’t the bank look at us strangely?” he asks. “Two men wanting to purchase together? We can’t pretend we’re brothers.”
“Well, we can put everything in your name. As a headmaster, you got good standing in the community. I thought it might be nice . . . having something to look forward to. And we ain’t getting’ any younger. You can start lookin’ at houses while I’m gone. It’ll be a good distraction.”
Thomas takes a sip of his beer, considering. “All right. Owning our own homewouldbe better for our financial future. And we probably have enough saved up for a deposit already. Perhaps I should meet with the bank manager?”
Charlie smiles, seemingly satisfied. “You should. With any luck this war will be over soon. Damn well should be, the way more and more of our troops are joinin’ the fight every day.” Hewraps his socked feet around Thomas’s ankle under the table. “I’ll be home before you know it, Red.”
Thomas nods and smiles, willing himself to believe it.
They finish dinner with dessert, Thomas cheekily licking off a dollop of chocolate pudding left on the corner of Charlie’s mouth. The dishes are left unwashed in the sink while they stroll hand in hand around their backyard just out of sight of their neighbors, sharing an after-dinner cigarette.
Hopelessly aware of every minute ticking down, they soon head back inside, where they methodically pack Charlie’s bag—not that he’s allowed to take much. What pains Thomas the most is that Charlie cannot take a photo of him. He couldn’t pass for Charlie’s brother, and who takes a photo of their brother to war, anyway? Thank God they have their tattoos—the one thing no one can ever take from them.
Thomas runs a bath, lighting candles and taking out a bar of lavender soap he’s been saving for a special occasion. He intends to forget his own needs for the next eleven hours and lavish Charlie with all that he desires. Whatever Charlie wants, he’ll willingly and wholeheartedly give.
They settle in the tub, Charlie between his legs and leaning back against his chest like always. For a while, Thomas just holds him and strokes his hair, trying not to think about what it might look like in a few days after it’s been shorn off. He presses kisses to Charlie’s temple and feels Charlie’s muscles relaxing, his weight growing heavier against Thomas’s chest.
“Do you remember when we only got to bathe together once every few months when your family left for the weekend?”
“Of course. Back then, I used to spend my days fantasizing about time alone with you. I used to fantasize about funnythings too, like brushing our teeth together, or cooking breakfast for you.” Thomas laughs at himself.
“I hope you fantasized about other things too.” Charlie tilts his head back, eyes mischievous and eyebrows arched.
Thomas bites playfully at his ear. “Oh, you know I did. My mind used to drift during lectures and I’d be left with a painful stiffy at the end of class I had to try to hide with my book bag.”
Charlie snorts. “Yeah? Did ya have a favorite fantasy?”
Thomas picks up the soap and starts lathering up and down Charlie’s chest. “Hmm, I had a couple.”
“Tell me,” Charlie requests, sounding like his mind has wandered to a faraway place. He sighs contentedly as Thomas softly circles his nipples.
Soaping up his hands, Thomas puts the bar down and cleans Charlie’s cock, the shaft hardening in his loose grip. He whispers in his ear, “They were filthy . . . dirty . . . thoroughly deviant fantasies.”
“Mmm, I’d expect nothing less from you, Red.”
Thomas gently rolls Charlie’s balls in his hand. “In the early days, I was obsessed with climaxing inside of you—and on you.”
Charlie laughs around a groan. “And how is that any different to now?”
“I’ll tell you how it’s different. Back then I used to fantasize about it, and now I get to do it.” Thomas strokes Charlie’s cock, words exchanged for breathless moans. Charlie’s back arches beautifully against him. “Mmm, you like that? Are you aching for me?” He tilts Charlie’s head back and captures his mouth in a heated kiss.
They quickly quit the tub, not bothering to towel off properly, and settle on their bed, Thomas covering Charlie’s body with his own.
“Charlie, tell me what you need.” Charlie bites down on his bottom lip, hesitation in his eyes. Thomas tries again. “Darling, I want to give you whatever you want. Don’t be afraid to tell me. Please . . .”
“I want it hard,” Charlie finally replies, face nervous and uncertain. “I want to feel it for days. I want to take some of you with me.”
Thomas is a little shocked, having expected just the opposite. It’s not like they don’t fuck hard from time to time, but he wonders if making love slowly would just be too painful, too raw. “I understand,” he says, smiling softly.
After lubricating them both, Thomas positions himself behind Charlie, who is waiting on his knees with his head lowered to the mattress. Caressing Charlie’s back, he guides himself in. With his emotions heightened, he’s almost glad Charlie has chosen this position.
“Hold my hips, Tommy. Hold ’em tight.”
Thomas grabs hold of Charlie’s narrow waist and thrusts, their bodies meeting time and time again with almost bruising force.
Charlie is his, and Charlie is life.
There is a mournful undertone in their moans and their words, and Thomas finds himself near exhaustion far quicker than usual.
