Page 156 of Rivals
“Is that…?” I tilt my head to see if it is. Revna laughs in my hold.
“I think that is my crack for everyone to see.”
I growl. “I’ll paint over it. That’s only for me.” She giggles again.
“You really don’t want to chance, even the possibility, of someone seeing my crack print, do you?” She says, smiling.
“No,” I grunt and carry her to the shower. “And I’ll show you why.”
I think she understands why now.
Chapter 91
Revna
Thereissomethingaboutthat in-between period where you’re so utterly exhausted, but you know you can’t rest yet. Your mind feels like it’s floating in some way. It feels like this separation from judgment within your mind. I find that I can paint faster and better than I ever have before.
After we finished washing all the paint off us, Lachlan ordered our favorite. We’ve been non-stop on our hands and knees or at the easel. We’ve even gotten to the point where we are almost taking shifts. I sleep a little while he works, and then he knocks out for a few hours while I paint. I finished my next one, which is representative of the drugs Lachlan and I did in the beginning but also indicative of the beginning of my worsening addiction. I’ve wanted to pop something a few times, but using my hands and mind to paint like this has helped me not think about it. I don’t have time because if I’m not painting, then I’m sleeping. I think it’s working, at least for now. This canvas is black and white, which is the opposite of how most people trip on OBA or even ecstasy. It’s a colorful, relaxing experience. At least, it is for most.
I used the feelings that came up when I woke up so blitzed out of my mind I fell back asleep. I took too many, and it scared Lachlan and me. The fear and anger I saw in his eyes is something I will never forget and never want to see again. I painted his eyes and used black-and-white values to reflect the light from our windows into his fearful stare.
Lachlan finished one of his representing our first kiss. It’s two statues that look like he carved from stone. They are kissing like it’s their last time. It makes my heart stutter every time I look at it. Our first kiss was angry, messy, and full of longing for something we didn’t understand nor had the power to fight.
We have a week left and six of the nine canvases to do. I’m forcing myself not to panic as I work on my next one. If I panic, I won’t finish it, and we have to finish it. The beast is screaming at me to get it out. I don’t want to fight it this time. I want to let it all out and then leave it behind. This is how I’ll do that.
“Revna, you good? When was the last time you drank some water?” Lachlan asks. I look up from my canvas.
“When’s the last time we ate? Because I don’t remember.” He chuckles and runs his hand through his hair, getting a ring caught in it, his tell. I know he’s nervous, too, but he’s keeping it together for me. He’s equally as driven as I am to finish this and do it well. I don’t know if it matters if we win anymore. I think finishing is a win in and of itself.
“I should have been paying better attention. I’m sorry, love,” he says and rubs his beard.
“Babe, I’m one to talk. I could have easily called for food or made those eggs in the fridge.” He shrugs.
“We can figure that out in a minute. I know where our last show will be.”
My chest gets tight, and I force a slow breath. Time is almost up. “Where is it?” I don’t know why I’m nervous about it. I think it’s because I see the end in sight, and that means more change.
Chapter 92
Lachlan
Three Days Until the Final Round
Wegotanemailfrom the MoMA people telling us our final pieces will be displayed at Central Park. It’s an incredible and once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. It’s also way too close to my dad.
“Our final show is in Central Park,” I tell Revna. Her eyes widen in surprise.
“Wow, that’s a little unusual. I can’t believe this is all happening.”
“I know it is, but I think it will be a cool experience. This has been a long time coming,” I say and look at the email again. It explains the process of transport of pieces. Previous pieces from the competition will be in an area off to the side so as not to pull away from the finale. They ask that we give them details about the size, shape, and space needed, and I respond quickly with our information. All together, our pieces measure forty-five feet long and six feet high.
“Did you tell them we need to figure out how to suspend them so people can walk under them like it’s the Sistine Chapel of Revna and Lachlan?” Revna asks. I nod my head, smiling at the phone.
“I’m telling them now, love,” I say.
“Good, and tell them I love Lachlan McKay.” My thumbs stop, hovering over the screen. I lift my chin and meet her eyes because she’s already staring at me.
It’s like she sees right through me. I’ve been searching for this all my life. To be seen as I am, not who someone thinks I should be. And it feels good, really good.
