Page 99 of Rivals
She frowns and her body freezes beneath my touch. I squeeze again, massaging the muscles, and she begins to relax. “I’m sorry, I kind of just threw that word out carelessly. I wanted to go about it differently. I know it scared you, and I know you said you were ok with it, but I want you to be honest about it. You haven’t said much, and I just wanted to make sure.”
She stands there for a moment and then crawls onto my lap. “Do you remember what I told you?” she asks me.
I nod because every word tore through my heart like a serrated knife. That’s where we left off. Granted, it wasn’t the time for that conversation, but it is now. “Tell me,” she whispers, dragging her fingers through my hair.
“You said you’ve never been anyone’s anything.” She nods. “What does that mean, Revna? Do youwantto be mine?“ I ask cautiously. If I had it my way, she would have been a while ago, but that’s not Revna. She would have fought me tooth and nail.
“That seems a bit redundant, don’t you think?” she asks. I rub my thumbs in the creases of her hips while I think for a moment.
“No, because I know you, and I know I will have to say it constantly. And that’s ok. But, Revna, I want you to tell me what you are to me. Otherwise, I’ll never know for sure. As much as I can read you, I can’t quite read your mind.”
She squirms in my hold, and I don’t let her go. “Tell me,” I murmur against her neck. Her scent fills my nose, and I take a deep breath. She doesn’t say anything, so I try again. “Do you remember what I told you when you thought I was asking for more than you can give?”
She nods against my shoulder. “I said I want only what you choose to give me, even though I will take it all. But I don’t think I was clear enough with you. Iwant it all, Revna. I want to have that chance with you. But if you don’t want to give me all of you, then what are we doing?”
“I’m scared,” she says. I feel her rub her nose on my shoulder and play with the hairs at the base of my head. “I’ve never given myself to anyone because no one’s ever wanted me. If I did, they would use me and leave me for dead. So I kept my walls high, and my heart iced over.”
“Revna, I’m not asking you to marry me…right now.” She gasps into my shoulder, and I smile against hers. Her arms are tense around my neck, and her fingers stall in my hair. “I want you to be mine, and that just so happens to come with the title of girlfriend. I’m asking you to be my girlfriend. Which is what you already are, only I had to drag it out of you. Regardless, I’m ok with that. I’m happy to do it. Butonlyif you want it.”
It’s quiet in our temporary home, and I can hear someone pacing back and forth above us. Every creek and groan in the building gets louder and louder. “I want to be your girlfriend,” she says into my shoulder.
I clasp my hand around her neck and pull her back so we can look each other in the eye. “What did you say?” I know exactly what she said, but I want her to say it to my face.
She swallows thickly, and her tongue dips out over her lips. I can physically see her working up the courage to say it. “I want to be your girlfriend.” My whole body feels light. I feel like I could lift the basilica and carry it on my back.
I kiss her chastely. “I want to be yours, too, every bit of me.” She smiles softly, and this feels like a significant step. It feels like I’m not only past her walls, but she has let me entirely into her heart. That is the greatest gift of all. The other words can wait. We don’t need to say them right now. Eventually, I will because I want her to have them. Even if she never gives them to me.
The tension in my body melts away as I kiss her, claiming her mouth in a wave of gratitude and emotion that flows through me. “I thought we were going to try and paint,” she says, a little breathless.
I flip around so she’s beneath me. “I am going to paint, only it will be you, with my tongue,” she shudders and bites her lower lip. Her pretty eyes lower as if they’re almost too heavy to keep open.
I pull her shirt to the side and kiss her collarbone up to her neck. Her hands run up and down my shirt-covered back, but I want to feel them on my skin. I rip my shirt off, and she puts her hands back where they were as I pepper kisses all over her face.
She digs her nails into my skin, and it drags a low groan from the back of my throat. I lean, biting the top of her ear, and nudge her pulse with my nose. “Sink your claws into me, little bird.”
Chapter 59
Revna
Hisgroanmakeseveryinch of my body awaken. The sounds he makes because of me make me feel good, even powerful. His hand slides around my neck, and I lean up into it. He grins and kisses me deeply, thoroughly, like he wants me to memorize his taste as if I could ever forget it.
I take my hand from his back and drag it up his torso. Every muscle twitches under my nails. He has claimed me in a way I’ve never allowed someone to, and I like it a lot.
He dips his tongue into my mouth, and I fight to keep my eyes open. I want to see him this way. I take pictures with my mind, but I succumb to him, and my eyes drift closed. The way he licks his tongue to the roof of my mouth and slides it against my own pulls an unbidden moan from me as he squeezes my ribs. Suddenly, making something together doesn’t seem productive, and I am more interested in seeing how high I can work him up instead.
He pauses his hands. “We should do work on something, shouldn’t we,” he groans reluctantly into my neck.
I ignore him and reach for the waistband of his pants, and he grips my wrist. He moves his head so he’s hovering right above my mouth. I purse my lips so they skim his. “Ah, ah, muse. I don’t want to stop either, but you’re right, we have work to do. If we didn’t, I would let you have your way with me.” I sigh and drop my hand.
He chuckles and kisses me again. “What if I tell you you can have your way with me?” I ask him and send him what’s hopefully a sultry look.
He chuckles. “Are you ok over there? You look a little constipated.” My face drops in fake offense.
“Rude,” I grumble. He smiles and gets off me, pulling me to stand from the bed.
“There are many ways I can be rude, Revna, but are you ready for that?”
“Trust me, I’ve experienced them all,” I grumble.
