Page 33 of Fighting For Light
“Right about what?” My heart thuds, and the butterflies in my stomach swarm so hard it makes me feel a little queasy.
“Being your nightmare,” he mumbles.
I don’t know what to make of that. We aren’t just friends anymore, and there’s no way we could go back to how things were. That ship has left the harbor. I’d rather sink it than lose what we started.
***
We finally arrive at the track in Florida, and there is a large open space for trailer hookups. I stay off to the side while Kai gets everything set. I glance at Dad across the entry road from us. We have some downtime until the competition tomorrow evening, and I need to get some work done for my clients, but I can hardly think straight with all the choices I have to make.
My throat tightens. Kai scared me when he agreed our situation could be a nightmare, so I need to hear him out first. After that, I’m going to tell Dad the truth…I think.
“Hey, gem,” Kai calls as he rolls his R7 backward down his garage ramp. I walk over to him as he hops off the bike and flips the kickstand. “Let’s go on a ride,” he says, grabbing two helmets off the counter. He holds one out to me, but I don’t take it.
“Kai, I’m pregnant,” I say, taking the helmet and pulling it over my head, still sure this is a very stupid choice.
He looks me up and down in my ripped jeans and tank top and then grabs a biking jacket.
“Put this on,” he says, wearing jeans, motorcycle boots, and a t-shirt. I’m frozen. This is stupid, but the thrill running through my veins makes me want to get on that bike. He grabs my helmet and tilts my head up. “I’ve got you. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
I nod, and Kai gets on the bike first. Then, he holds his hand out to help me up behind him.
The back end sits on a tilt towards the driver. I leave a little space between us, but I’m not sure how I should hold on to him. He sits up a little more, his feet still on the ground, and grabs my thighs, pulling me tightly to him. “Hold on to me, and don’t let go.”
I squeeze my knees at his hips while my chest lays against his back. The bike roars to life under us, and I grip his t-shirt tighter. I’ve ridden on the back of bikes before, but this time is different. Kai is between my legs.
He pats my hands and gently hits the throttle, driving slowly out of the track arena until we’re on the main road. Then he guns it, and every muscle in my body seizes so hard it hurts.
We drive for at least twenty minutes, passing signs lit by the lights above them, pointing to the beach. Kai brings the bike to a slow stop, and I almost let go, but he grabs my hands, keeping them there.
“Are you doing okay?” Kai asks over the mic in our helmets.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I respond.
The light turns green, and he lifts his feet, rocketing us down the street again. He increases the speed on the empty road, and my heart pounds in my chest. Adrenaline throttles through my veins, and I feel like I can fly. My hands involuntarily grip his shirt tighter as he leans us forward, and then he takes the curve slowly before gunning it again. Breath whooshes from my mouth and I giggle out of excitement.
Kai turns into the empty beach parking lot and rolls the bike into a parking spot, smoothly flipping the kickstand. He turns slightly, holding out his hand to help me off. My legs wobble as the blood rushes through them, and Kai grabs my hip, steadying me before I fall.
“It sounded like you enjoyed that,” he says, getting off the bike after me.
I take a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. “I did. It’s been a while.”
In the moonlight, I can see that cute lift of his mouth.
“Come on,” he beckons, holding out his hand. I take it, and we stop right before the sand. I pull my shoes and socks off while I hold onto Kai. He slips his off, and we leave them on the sidewalk to walk down to the crashing waves. The beach is dimly lit by the street lights in the parking lot, but the moon is mainly our guide. We walk a little way down the beach, and the white sand almost glitters in the blue cast.
“Want to sit?” Kai asks, and I drop down, digging my feet into the sand to bury them. We’re quiet, but it’s a comfortable, safe silence, the crashing waves soothing the anxiety weighing on my chest. I admire his profile before reaching for his hand, and he squeezes back. “What’s on your mind, gem?”
Kai is so incredibly perceptive, and it throws me off sometimes.
I’m scared to even utter his name, but I need to ask the question. There’s roughly seven months to figure all of this out. I’m nervous about the legal aspect and custody because I was caught between my parents when they separated. I force the words out around the rocks, clogging my throat. “Do you think Rafe will try to…claim the baby?” I whisper.
18
Kai
I can feel hereyes trailing over me. I glance at her before looking back at the midnight ocean. “He knows the baby is his, right?”
“Yeah,” she says quietly.
