Page 137 of Dirty Roulette
“You really went and got me stuff?” She sniffles with smiles and frowns mixed together. With the back of her hand, she wipes the tears from her cheeks.
“You’re bleeding to death. I can’t lose you.”
“Oh my god, you’re insane.”
She lets me in, shutting the door and locking it. “Naomi went out with Scottie P. I don’t think she’ll be back tonight.” She shrugs, following behind me.
The bags plop to the bed. “So,” I begin awkwardly, “I didn’t know what shit you used, so I got the organically grown cotton stuff.” I pull out the plastic tube, and she takes it in her hand. “Then these had different sizes. I don’t know your vagina size... I mean, I guess I do... but...”
“What?” She laughs and takes the blue box and places it on the bed.
“Here is a Diva Cup. Maybe you know what that is? The instructions kinda scared me, but I think I’ll live.” She digs through the bags, listening real closely with the sweetest smile on her face. “Oh, and Midol for your cramps, I can’t have you cramping on me. That’s a big no-no...” I pry open the box, man-handling the bottle so she can pop some right now. “Here’s some water for that, too. I got you a bunch of candy and ice cream.”
She wraps her arms around my neck and sobs into my shirt. “Thank you.”
I’m looking at a little over sixty days of her officially being my girlfriend. I don’t know why I am counting when I know there is my entire life I’m going to spend with her. Payton gathers her towel and bag of toiletries to shower. I’m impatient and don’t want to be alone, so I stand outside the bathroom leaning against the wall, hands in my pockets, listening to the shower pitter-pattering and the sloshing of water.
She comes out smelling like strawberries and I follow her back to the dorm, where I refuse to leave and watch one of her favorite silly horror movies. I helped her eat the little container of ice cream and at some point, I fell asleep in the middle of the movie. When I do wake up, it’s dark, but she’s curled up on my chest.
I love her. And it hurts. It hurts how much I care about her.
Chapter fifty-three
Payton
It’s the middle of February as I fiddle with the coffee cup sleeve. The tip of my tongue is numb and tingles from sipping it too early. Charlie sits across from me nursing on her latte, a mist of steam rises from her cup. The hiss and the grinding of the espresso machine fills the coffee shop. We sit in pure silence and haven’t spoken much since leaving the courthouse after Brody’s sentencing.
The television mounted on the wall is stuck on the news station. The anchors have nothing better to do than showcase police escorting Brody in his orange jumpsuit from the courthouse to their vehicles.
Brody got a slap on the wrist for hazing, and girls swoon over him online through threads and reels. The comments are nauseating as women beg to be hazed by him. I don’t understand people. What’s worse is that I set my expectations too high, thinking he would be sitting behind bars a lot longer. But Brody only gets to rot in prison for a year with the possibility of parole for his rape charge. The fine was pocket change for his dad and if Brody’s extra good and collectsenough gold stars he’ll be out sooner. The revenge porn website he hosted wasn’t even allowed in court. Why am I not surprised they run the justice system like a kindergarten classroom.
Brittni on the other had received five years for the attempted murder on Mr. Clorox, or I guess I should sayPatricksince he did sort of get stabbed helping take Brody down. Then it was simply two counts of aggravated assault when it came to Charlie and I. They used the time she already served as punishment for most of it. It was a double edged sword piercing my heart hearing the verdict. The second it went south Charlie seemed out of it, just disassociating all together as the judge addressed the courtroom.
All of us went onto the podium and testified against Brittni. They ripped Ryder apart, accusing him of rape and being abusive towards her. Lawyers went all out trying to convince the courtroom he cheated like they were somehow a married couple. He hurled into a trash can from the stress of some of their questions.
They used Charlie’s memory loss as their defense to help Brittni. It made it a million times worse that they would persistently ask her what happened the night of the concert. She couldn’t remember anything. Since she couldn’t recount the events, the defense lawyers babbled on that anyone could have attacked her – and Brody’s trial outcome wasn’t allowed before the jury either.
I divert my attention away from the television screen, and back to my creamy coffee and take a sip. It’s sweet and riddled with caramel and whipped cream.
“Noah was offered a record deal,” Charlie breaks the silence and plays with the sugar packets neatly packed in a small wooden container.
“Really?” I ask and pull off the white plastic lid and a puff of heat from the coffee hits my face.
“Yeah, his music exploded after that performance at the game. They’ve hit over a million subscribers.” I stare at the jagged pink scar on her forehead from where she was hit in the head with Brittni’s crowbar. The photographs from the court hearings flicker into my brain and vanish as I shake my head.
“They’re going on tour after graduation. The concerts were sold out within a day.” Charlie pushes strands of her hair behind her ears. I’m a bit mad she cut it to her shoulders. The long hair she grew out for years was just chopped right off.
I run both hands over my knees, wiping off the sweat building. “That’s amazing.” The air feels thin as I take a sip letting the warmth of the coffee fill my stomach.
“I think I’m going to go with them.” Charlie licks foam off her bottom lip before taking a napkin and dabbing her lips. “I can take online classes instead.”
“Oh...” I furrow my brows, with a sadness sinking its teeth in.
“I just don’t want to be here.” Her eyes glance all over the place, and I watch her swallow hard as she meets my gaze. There is something empty about her grey eyes, like a piece of her was taken, and the glimmer in them that was once there dulled out. “Noah said I would have a chance to see other places. I’d get a break from all of this shit.”
“You deserve that,” I say back.
“After that sentencing, I feel really defeated and done. I need something new. I just know it might be hard on you if I’m not around to comb your damn hair.”
