Page 117 of Perfect Order
“What was it?” Instead of pushing me away like I deserve, her eyes focus on me for the first time. I can feel emotions I haven’t allowed myself to feel boil up inside.
“I was blindsided.” Immediately, Leanne starts nodding in understanding. “It’s so stupid—working for Beckett, I constantly never know what’s going to happen from one day to the next, but…”
“There’s still a measure of control in those situations. You train how to react to them,” she murmurs.
“Then in less than a few hours, it felt like everything changed: my heart, my job, my pride. And I chose the wrong things to hold on to.”
“And you chose what you’d trained for,” she concludes.
She gets it.A gush of air rushes out, and the words just flow out. “And I was wrong, Crash. So wrong.”
For long moments, we sit in silence. My gut churns, terrified that at any moment, she’s going to throw me out when I hear her whisper, “So, what happens next?”
My phone pings loudly with an incoming text. I frown since it’s set to Silent. Flipping it over, I gape when I read the text.
Tell Q?za Dioscuri is secured. I personally enjoyed destroying her laptop which Sam deduced was the actual timer. Sorry, not sorry. Listen, on the begging front—let her know she can have anything she wants. Women seem to like that shit. At least, my wife does.
I don’t reply. I simply turn the phone around and let her read Thorn’s message. And when she lets out a primal scream that causes her mother and the nursing staff to come rushing in, I simply hand her the button for her pain medicine. “She rolled the wrong way,” I explain blandly. They all back out of the room, still eyeing us both warily.
After everyone exits, she keeps her eyes pinned on the door before murmuring, “I can’t stop what’s going to happen next, Kane. The press, the media—there’s only so much that even Thorn can do.”
I bend over her and press my lips to her forehead, then her heart before I lay them against her lips and murmur, “I don’t care. You’re alive. I’ll wait as long as it takes to straighten out this clusterfuck. I’ll be right by your side. When I can’t be, I’ll be where it matters more—next to your heart. I love you, Leanne—not because of what you are, but because of who you are to me.”
Her lips begin to tremble. “I love you. Always. Forever. I can’t stop.”
The words I feared I’d never hear her say again wash over me like a benediction. I slide my hand gently behind her neck and kiss her. “And I know that’s a vow you take seriously.”
“To death.”
When I think about how close she came to that tonight, I pull back and lay my head on her stomach. I’m not certain how long it’s going to be before I’ll no longer witness the gun being held to her heart.
“Kane?”
“What is it?”
“I have to tell you something.”
Oh boy. “Let’s hear it.”
“I think it’s time to hit the pain medicine button for real now.” I lift my head and catch the flash of pain cross her face. “Despite the fact I was wearing a vest, this hurts like a bitch.”
Scooting as close as possible without putting any pressure on her bruise, I lay my lips on hers. “Just remember, the only thing preventing you from bleeding instead of just being bruised is the fact you had that vest on.” My face crumbles. “Crash, I can’t imagine what I would do without you again.”
Her dark blue eyes begin dripping tears. “We’ll work it out. We won’t have to find out. Okay?”
“Swear it,” I demand harshly.
“I swear.”
And for long minutes until the doctor comes in to check on her now awake patient, I try to make up for the long months apart. Though in my heart, I know Thorn’s probably right. I’m going to end up begging.
It’s okay. It’s the right order of things.
EPILOGUE - TWO YEARS LATER
“Did you see the garbage StellaNova wrote today?” I toss my tablet into Kane’s lap as we sit on our couch after dinner at our home in Manhattan.
He reads the article aloud. “Is Kylie Miles spinning in her grave as she watches her sister take the spotlight ‘in the name of love’? While we completely support the charity, is it necessary for the other ‘Erzulie’ to perform? But who are we to judge. The computer hacker is backed up on stage by Beckett Miller and Brendan Blake, so we’re not going to miss a minute of the show.” His aqua eyes are lit with fury over the magazine’s attempt to get a rise out of me since they damn well know I played fast and loose with their website to redeem Beckett a few years ago. “I know what she’d say, Lee. She’d be damn proud of you. Look at what you’ve established in her honor.”
