Page 156 of His Darkest Obsession
Every mileI get closer to Mother's Hamptons cottage sharpens my anger just a little bit more until it’s been honed to a razor’s edge.
The small beachfront property sits isolated at the end of a private road. It had been a gift from my father to her a long time ago.
It was from a time when the two of them still believed that they loved each other, back when he was no more than another man with a dream and she was his promised bride.
Before the cracks in their marriage turned into gaping chasms that couldn't be closed. Before the cheating. The screaming matches at night.
And before she finally had enough of it all and arranged for that bullet in his head three years ago.
The irony of it all isn't lost on me as I drive.
I barely slept last night. After Indigo and I finished our lovemaking in the shower, she asked for space. I gave it to her,respecting her wishes even as everything in me wanted to stay by her side.
When I woke this morning, one of the maids told me that she'd left with Svetlana to drop off Amara at school.
And I can still feel the hollow ache in my chest.
But above all, the single memory that haunts me was when she pulled me in for a kiss right as I was about to tell her that I love her. Those three words died in my throat under the passion of her kiss.
It felt deliberate. Like she knew what I was about to confess and stopped me from saying it.
But why?
I pull up to the cottage and kill the engine. My mother is already outside, standing on the porch in the greatcoat that had been the only possession she brought with her after she married Father.
Her hair flutters in the chilly coastal breeze, and her face remains that familiar mask of indifference that I've known my entire life.
As I approach, my eyes linger on the hydrangeas Father planted almost twenty years ago. She still never bothered to remove them.
Even after killing him, she kept his flowers.
"Tolya," she says coolly, not moving from her position. "I was wondering when you'd show up."
"Is it true?" I ask. "Did you put Vassily into digging up the NDA about Indigo?"
"Come inside, Tolya." Mother's eyes narrow slightly before she turns towards the door. "Before you catch a cold out here."
"We can have this conversation right here."
"You are still my son," she says. "Even if you're ready to refuse me as your mother."
She turns around without waiting for my response and begins walking back inside.
"Stay here, Valentina Ivanovna," I switch to her patronymic. "Eto moi prikaz."
She stops with her back still to me, and her shoulders stiffens at the tone in my voice.
"Are you here to speak to me as my son," she asks quietly. "Or as my pakhan?"
The sea crashes in the distance, and scent of salt carries from the shore.
"Both," I answer firmly. "Now answer my question."
She turns around slowly and meets my gaze. I see the defiance in her eyes, but also a familiar haunting emptiness. How many times did Father use those same three words on her? And how many times did she obey while she nursed that bitterness in her heart?
We glare at each other while the sea crashes in the distance. Finally, she break the silence.
"Yes," she says. "I sent Vasya to find the NDA."
