I dial her number the moment I’m outside and hope she answers. Two rings, three, four…just when I’m about to give up, she picks up.
“Hello.”
“Did I wake you?”
“No. I was reading. Just got into bed.”
Jesus.“I wanted to check on you since I know you’re home alone.”
“Not the first time, won’t be the last.”
“Do you want me to come –?”
“No. I’m fine.”
Frustration grips me so I take a deep breath, expelling it from my mouth. I never know what to do when it comes to her. I feel like fucking breaking something.
“Are you okay?” she asks.
“No, I’m not okay. I feel like I’m going crazy. I want you so much I don’t know what to do with my fucking self. I can wait, Raven. I will fucking wait. I just need to know that I’m not waiting in vain.”
“Ican’t, Gage. I can’t give you what you want, and you can’t give me what I want.”
“Is this about the boy?”
“His name is Chris, and this is about me. I’m not just going to spread my legs for you because you want me to. I’m not Lonnie.”
“Is that what you think? I know that you’re nothing like your whore sister. Chicks like her are for amusement, nothing more. You…you’re different. Iwantto be with you.”
“No, you don’t want to be with me. You want to have sex with me. Therefore itwouldbe for your amusement.”
“Trust me, it’s not like that.”
She doesn’t speak for a while, but I know she’s still there. I hear her breathing.
“There are a lot of women out there who want to be with you.”
“I know. That doesn’t matter. What matters is whoIwant.”
“We can’t be together. Not now, not two months from now, not ever.”
“Why?”
“Good night, Gage.”
I want to put my fucking fist through the wall. Instead, I kick the trashcan in front of me with a loud growl.That’s it. I’m done. It’s her fucking loss.I’m not wasting any more time on some bi-polar ass chick. If she doesn’t want me then I sure as hell don’t want her ass. I turn when I hear footsteps behind me.
“Hey.”
It’s the blondes from earlier. Maybe I can salvage this night after all. “Hello again, ladies.”
“We’re heading home. Just wondering if maybe…you’d like to join us.”
I look them over from head to toe. I guess I could do a lot worse. “Lead the way. I’ll follow.”
CHAPTER 10
***Raven***