Page 26 of Petals of Blue: Part One
Sixteen
DECLAN
Running a café for my parents wasn't something I thought I'd be doing when I grew up. It is lucky, though.
Mom and Dad retired last year, and their gift to me was their Chicago location. Did I want it? No. I'd rather find my own interests instead of staying in the family company.
But I said yes because I've never told my parents no. After the incident when I went off to college to get a business degree, our relationship has been strained. Their truth finally came out about why they urged us away from Erica, and I could never look at them the same.
Saying no and actively going against what they want is still incredibly hard to do. I know if they find out we're trying to befriend Erica again, they'll have a hissy fit and probably disown us.
Would I even care at this point? I'm not sure, but I would give them back the store. Thankfully I'm not the manager, but even as the owner my goal is to still be involved.
I've spent the last week studying our numbers and employee list. Next on my agenda is to meet everyone, host some meetings with the supervisors and staff. It feels weirdnot to be involved in my store, plus it gets me away from Felix.
I've been avoiding him as much as possible since we went to our neighbor’s house last week with the Tupperware and wine bottle. It's been six days since any of us have seen Blue, and I'm feeling mighty itchy.
After pestering Bethany, Blue's friend and our neighbor, we found out she's on a road trip with Violet. Just the mention of Blue's daughter makes me see red.Where the fuck is the baby daddy?
"Hey man," Felix greets sleepily as he ambles toward the coffee machine.
Zoning out on his bare, muscled back, I sink into my annoyance.Why the fuck is he up so early?The way he calls memanupsets me. Maybe Jared has a point. If I tell Felix about my feelings and the raging boner I always have for him, maybe he'd finallynotice.
I'm friendzoned, and it's been getting to me these past few months. Especially now that we have Erica back in our lives, albeit coincidental and forced, everything feels heightened.
My guilt, which once only hindered my mental state, is now eating me alive. Blue would hardly look at me when I was right there, and when she did, the pain in her sparkly blue eyes twisted the knife in my heart.
"You okay, bro?"
If I wasn't pissed a second ago, I most definitely am now.Bro.Just twist the knife harder, asshole.Slamming back the last of my coffee, I let the bitterness sink into my psyche.
"I don't know, Felix. Do I look fuckingfineto you?!"
Abs point right at me, and dirty blond eyebrows slam down. "Jesus. What the fuck is your problem?"
Before I can cool myself down, I snarl, "You!" Snatching my keys off the counter, I storm out of the house and stomp to my car.
"Fucking dick, ruining my mood on my first day." Mywhite-knuckled grip on the steering wheel calms me ever so slightly. The only thing I can control in my life is my driving, so I might as well do it right.
As I'm ending the drive to the café in downtown Chicago, the scene I made in the kitchen starts flickering in my mind. Now that I've been able to take a breath and separate myself fromoneof the people causing me heartache, I realize how impulsive and childish I acted.
All that realization does is annoy the shit out of me. I'm aware of my toxic tendencies, now what the hell do I do with them?
Parked in the back employee lot, I lock my car then lock it again.Can't be too careful. With my keys in the front pocket of my black jeans, I check my buttons on my shirt. Casual but respectable.
Just when I think I have myself under control, I step through the front door of Butter and Bloom and find Blue Bennett waiting at the pickup spot.
"Where's Violet?"Why did that come out accusatory?My way of greeting the girl who never hurt so much as a fly is borderline asking for a punch in the face.
Blue jolts, looking up from her phone. "What?"
I glance at her ring finger on both hands. "No ring. Baby daddy a piece of shit, huh?"
"What the fuck are you talking about, Declan?" Blue looks completely shocked and lost. I don't blame her. Nor can I blame Felix for my foul mood.
I'm having an out-of-body experience. IknowI should stop and apologize, but can't. "Your kid, Violet. Her daddy didn't marry you, huh?"
Fuck.
