Page 36 of Petals of Blue: Part One
"Well, A," Felix mutters, poking at her bruised skin. "Janine and Beth need to get back to the bar."
The woman who I believe is Janine scoffs. "Who are you to tell me what to do?"
Felix doesn't even spare her a glance. "I'm your boss. Just replaced your previous bar manager a few hours ago." With that, he levels Janine with a blank stare, waiting for her to argue. She doesn't and neither does Blue which freaks me out.
When he told us about accepting the position above her, Roman, Declan, and I thought it would be a disaster. I'm not seeing a tsunami of rage like I expected, though.
All I witness is the emotion in Blue's sparkling gaze disintegrating behind a shield of neutrality.Come back, Bee.
Cursing, Janine apologizes to Blue before rushing back out to serve drinks. I'm assuming with all three bartenders running back here, someone else had to step in for them. What do I know, though?
When the door slams shut behind the two women, Blue snaps, "So you're only here to fix an employee’s hand, huh? Well, don't bother. Just give me a minute and I'll be right out."
Felix continues twisting her arm around, ignoring her quip. There's no way in hell she will be going back out there tonight. I don't need to ask Felix for his thoughts either.
"Just stop, Felix!" Blue snaps, trying to yank her wrist away from his gentle touch. She barely moves, and Felix catches her elbow before she can hurt herself.
"Don't move, Bennett." Felix grabs her jaw in a strong grip,making her eyes widen and my lungs stop working. "I swear to fuck if you hurt yourself..." he threatens more so to himself. Releasing Blue, he resumes icing her ache.
"Why do you care?" She no longer sounds mad, but there's a thick layer of uncertainty in her tone. The guilt that has lived inside of me for eleven fucking years expands and quivers in my soul.
Felix leans back ever so slightly and returns his touch to her jaw. "I've never stopped caring, sweetheart."
Defiance flashes in her gaze. She's closing herself off right in front of me. "Yes. You did. Nobody does what you did if they actuallycared, Felix."
"Bee..." I murmur, needing her to see me. I need Blue to see me so maybe she'll realize how much I regret my childish choices. Ineedher to see me so maybe she will allow me to see her.
While the concept of her opening up to us sounds like a win, it sure as fuck doesn't feel like one.
My heart doesn’t crack, itshatterswhen she sees me and Declan close by.Blue releases a scratchy sob that makes her entire body jolt. Her hands, one swollen, the other trembling, fly up to cover her face as she doubles over her lap.
Every atom of my body is tuned into every cry and shake of Blue's body.
While Iknowwithout a doubt that the woman before me is the strongest one I have ever met, I'm not naïve enough to think the strongest people are exempt from overwhelming turmoil.
My strong, beautiful,vibrantBlue is crumbling. While I'm heartbroken at the sight of her salty tears ruining her makeup, I can't help but feel relieved.
I've known since the moment we were reunited that the core of Erica Bennett has not changed. Blue is the persona she adopted to survive. To protect the energetic, happy girl who struggled to live on during her childhood.
"Blue, ca-can I?" Felix stumbles over his words which hurts me in a new way. He's always so damn sure of himself, I can't control the rise of my anxiety as I watch him reach for our woman with hesitancy that doesn't look right on him.
She only cries harder, swaying forward with her hands still covering her face, but she doesn't stop him.
This feels like a first step.Please let this be our first step.
Twenty-Three
BLUE
For as long as I can remember I've been fighting to shield the most innocent parts of myself. When my parents died, I began collecting bricks when other kids were collecting cool rocks.
They weren't tangible, but they were necessary. One by one, I stacked them around my heart in an attempt to block some of life's punches.
At six, my mom and dad died in a car accident. My aunt was my only living relative and took me in under the idea that she would get a lot of money for hercharity.
My memory back then is fuzzy, so even if she did get money, it most definitely wasn't a fortune for becoming a guardian of an orphan.
Orphan.
