Page 42 of Petals of Blue: Part One
Blue jumps up, rage pouring off of her in waves. Headlights shine through the trees, drawing her attention and simultaneously making her deflate. Taking the four of us in, she zeros in on her backpack in Jared's hands.
He offers it to her with a nod and a sad look. "Bethany texted me, saying that's her, and you can head over to her place if you want."
Something that looks a little like jealousy flashes in her gaze when Jared mentions Bethany texting him. Hope flares that maybe there's still something between all of us. Some kind of connection we can play off of.
"Maybe next time," she says quietly, responding to Felix. Turning, she sniffs and begins her trek to the neighbors.
"Oh, and Blue!" I jump up, shouting for her. "The banana bread and the flower tattoos on my neck are a reminder of that girl we still love."
It's a bold statement, but I don't regret saying it. Not even when I hear her choke softly on a sob, because that means what I have to say affects her.
Blue doesn't look back, but she does say, "Good night."
Just that simple acknowledgment that the past ten minutes weren't a figment of my imagination makes me feel lighter than I have in eleven years.
Twenty-Seven
BLUE
“Knock, knock!" Bethany sings before cracking the guest room door open. The distinct coffee aroma she brings with her makes up for the morning sunlight she unleashes on my red-rimmed eyeballs.
"Thanks," I croak, taking the mug from her when she gets close. "You didn't have to."
Beth hums and sits on the edge of the bed. "I know. I wanted to, though." Her blonde ringlets are in two low pigtails, and she's makeup free. In a pair of sweatpants and a crop tank top, my friend looks stunning.
"What time is it?" I've refused to look at my phone all night. It's on do-not-disturb, but I have Violet saved as an emergency contact to bypass the silent mode in case she needs me.
"Seven-thirty," Bethany responds. She's watching me with a certain amount of hesitation that I'm not used to seeing. I've been pretty solid and reliable since we became friends. Now I'm a mess.
"You can ask," I encourage her. Knowing Bethany, she would wait forever before saying what's on her mind. She's the timid one in our group, for reasons that hurt my heart.
Blowing out a breath, she grabs my injured hand and gently cradles it in her lap. "Are you okay?"
I want to lie to her so fucking bad, but I can't bring myself to do it. "Not really."
"You're not crying."
Her observation makes me laugh. "I've been crying all night, babe. I'm fresh out of tears."
"Do you want to talk about it? What happened last night?"
Now that I've given her permission to ask about my shit, she's firing them left and right.
My knee-jerk reaction is to say I don't want to talk about it, but I really fucking should. After hearing Roman's point of view and what happened back then, I feel disorganized in my beliefs and feelings.
Instead of brushing her off, I pull my hand from her lap and take a couple of sips of my coffee. I'm going to need all the boost I can get to process this shit.
"First," I glare at her, "we're going to talk about you just sending them on their way with my sleeping body."
"Psh!" she huffs and waves me away. "They were so freaking worried about you, and I knew I'd be home soon to take over babysitting duty."
"I don't need to be babysat."
She eyes my bruised wrist. "Whatever you say. Now tell me what happened."
I relay everything Roman said to me last night. Her face barely changes as she soaks it all in, making me wonder what's going on inside her head.
"Am I stupid for giving them any attention?" I blurt out at the end. Losing hours of sleep last night because of them feels crazy to me. I've lost a lot of time in my life thinking about the four of them, and I vowed never to allow it again.
