Page 59 of Gambling with the Earl
“Rest,” he repeated, dropping a chaste kiss onto her forehead. “And I will make sure you are not disturbed.”
“Guy.” She reached up to catch hold of his fingers. “Thank you.”
There were so many things she needed to say, but weariness overwhelmed her and her eyes were closing of their own accord. She stretched out beneath the blanket and permitted her frenzied thoughts to settle.
She would explain it all in the morning. She would find the right words; words that would make everything okay again.
As she drifted off to sleep, she heard Guy whispering against her ear.
“Thank you, Kitty,” he said, “for showing me that there are still some people in this world who can be trusted.”
Chapter Sixteen
He didn’t sleepa wink. How could he when such thoughts chased around his mind, tormenting his every moment?
For a while he stood and watched Kitty sleep. Her face looked so young and untroubled. He would have stretched out beside her, enjoying the feel of her strong, warm body against his, but he hated the prospect of disturbing her. She had been so distressed; through exposure to the storm…and something more. Was it their previous intimacy that had caused her such anxiety?
He rubbed at his tired eyes, forcing himself to think back to the events that had taken place only that morning. Kitty had wanted his touch as much as he wanted hers, he was sure of it. He had not forced her. He ground his teeth at the very idea.
What then, had happened? Why had she turned from a confident young woman into someone so clearly distressed?
His eyes once again rested on her sleeping face. Had someone struck her? Been unkind to her? He knew Thomas had searched her room. Guy had been unable to think of a reason he should not, and to warn his manservant out of one specific chamber when orders had been given to search the entire castle would only cause suspicion.
He rubbed at the stubble on his cheeks and tried to settle on the three-legged stool where Kitty had perched earlier, but it was far too small for his long limbs.
He’d wanted to shield Kitty from gossip and suspicion. Even when the black rage had descended upon him, one thought had been clear and true in his mind: Protect Kitty. Ensure no one discovered what they had done. And once the matter of the stolen jewels was dealt with, he’d have returned to the more pressing task of finding a way for them to be together.
He jumped up from the stool, frustration swelling within him.
He shouldn’t have become so fixated on the theft of the jewels. Should have kept his focus on Kitty. Instead, he’d become a frenzied fool, obsessed with enacting revenge. And why did revenge matter?
It didn’t. Not when he had a good woman by his side. A castle to call home. Coin chests that were full to bursting.
“Never lower your guard,” his father had said. It was the motto he’d been raised by. To sense hostility long before it arrived. To trust no one.
But his father had lived a lonely, angry life. What if he was wrong?
His hand clenched into a fist. Kitty had shown him the joy that could be found by letting in the light, but the darkness lived inside him, was as elemental to his life as the oxygen he breathed. And he didn’t want to live in darkness, not anymore.
The first, pink rays of morning light were casting a tentative, rosy glow through the half-door of the stables. Guy had promised to wake Kitty at sunrise, but they had a short while left to them still. She looked so peaceful. He didn’t want to wake her, not just yet.
By waking her, he risked losing her all over again.
He must find the right words to explain himself. To promise that never again would he allow a dark rage to consume him.
Could he make such a promise? No, but he could promise to turn over a new leaf. To be more humble, more trusting, less inclined to look for the worst in people.
Seized by a surge of energy, he walked out into the dawn, alive with hope for a future he’d never dared to believe could be his. One filled with, dare he think it, love?
Could it be true that a woman as lovely as Kitty might feel the same way about him?
Guy strode into the outer courtyard. The early morning air had been washed clean by the storm. Everything smelled fresh and newly alive. His boots splashed through puddles of rainwater as his eyes roamed automatically over the castle ramparts, looking for damage. He stopped, hands on his hips, and swivelled around. The walls were high and unbroken, despite the ceaseless assault from both the skies and the waves. He pursed his lips, unable to believe in such good fortune.
Maybe his luck was finally changing?
The first musical notes of birdsong floated high overhead and Guy felt his lips stretch into a smile. New life, new hope, was all around him.
He must wake Kitty now. Wake her up and profess his true feelings for her.
