Page 70 of Gambling with the Earl
The front parlour brought her no peace, nor did her bedchamber. Eventually she found herself wandering in the kitchen garden, deaf to the birdsong and blind to nature’s bounty all around her. She walked around in circles, growing more confused with every turn until a familiar voice pierced her delirium.
“When Lizzie told me you were out here pacing up and down like a woman gone mad, I thought she was exaggerating,” Rosalind declared.
Kitty glanced towards her sister, who was sitting on the back steps in a loose-fitting dress and hugging her knees. She opened her mouth to tell Rosalind to fetch a shawl against the chill, butthen closed it again. The day carried only the slightest breeze. And besides that, Rosalind had proved herself well capable of making her own decisions.
It was Kitty who needed the advice.
“I don’t know what to do.” The words were ripped from her. She expected her sister to look surprised, but Rosalind merely smiled and drew her neat braid of hair down over one shoulder.
“So, my wise and sensible older sister finally admits that she doesn’t have all the answers.”
Kitty shot her a look, but couldn’t take the time to formulate a proper response. Her mind was full of Guy. She shouldn’t have left, not without expressing herself properly. He had told her he was falling in love with her. And she had allowed him to think that those feelings were not returned, when in fact her love for him filled every pore of her body.
Rosalind jumped up and took her arm with surprising strength. “Tell me,” she ordered.
Kitty looked at her helplessly. When did her little sister grow so poised and lovely? Beside her, Kitty was like a wild woman with tangled hair and swollen eyes. “I’ve made so many mistakes,” she whispered.
Rosalind reached up to stroke her dishevelled hair. “With love in your heart and purity of intention,” she said, simply.
“But that doesn’t make anything better.” Kitty sat down, uncaring of the damp grass beneath her. Rosalind pursed her lips, then gathered her skirts to kneel gracefully by her side. “Don’t sit there, the grass is wet,” Kitty warned instinctively.
Rosalind gave a short bark of laughter. “Let us walk then, dear sister, and you can tell me what ails you.” She got lightly to her feet and extended her hand. “You can tell me anything, you know. I’m practically an old married woman.”
“Oh, Rosalind,” Kitty exclaimed, her cheeks blushing pink for the second time, but her sister spun away laughing.
“I don’t mean that.”
“I should hope not.” Kitty smoothed her skirts, painfully aware of her own double standards.
“Richard has kissed me though,” Rosalind declared boldly. “And I let him. I even wanted him to. I love him, Kitty. And I can’t describe how wonderful that makes me feel.”
A lump lodged in Kitty’s throat. “You don’t have to describe it,” she whispered, “I know it for myself.”
Rosalind spun around to grasp both her hands. Her grip was warm and reassuring. “Really?”
“Really.” Kitty wanted to smile but was closer to crying.
“With who?” Rosalind’s eyes lit up with curiosity. “Who else was at the castle with you? Not another one of the servants, surely?”
Kitty’s courage failed her, but why should she hide the truth from her sister of all people?
“With the Earl of Rossfarne,” she whispered. “Guy.”
“The Earl of Rossfarne?” Rosalind shrieked so loudly that Kitty was sure the fishermen in the harbour must have heard. She shushed her urgently, but Rosalind merely shook her head, her long braid swinging from side to side. “You’ve been a little quiet these last few days, I did wonder if anything was wrong. But I never thought…” She trailed off, biting her lip in wonder. “I certainly never thought that anything would happen between you andhim.”
“If you met him, you would like him.” Kitty swallowed, knowing such a meeting was unlikely to happen.
“The Earl of Rossfarne?” Rosalind repeated, at a more reasonable volume. “The man who took our jewels? The man who gambled with Father overyou?” Her voice rose uncontrollably again.
Kitty grasped her sister’s wrist and pulled her further away from the house. The last thing she wanted was for Lizzie orAlfred to hear her confession. “He tried to return the jewels,” she said, pleased to tell this tale at last. “No one would answer the door to him.”
“Oh.” Rosalind’s eyes were as round as saucers. “So that was what he wanted?”
Kitty nodded. “All the time I was there, I was trying to find a way to steal back the jewels. But if I’d just told him the truth from the start, he would have given them to me. I know that now. I was such a fool.” She clutched her arms over her chest as if trying to keep hold of the grief that was spilling out of her.
Rosalind nibbled her lip thoughtfully as pigeons cooed from the fruit trees. “How could you have known though?” she asked after a pause.
“Because he only ever showed me kindness.” Sorrow dragged down her limbs and she sniffed in a most unladylike manner.
