Page 81 of Gambling with the Earl
“Everything,” he answered firmly. Kitty gave a sigh and leaned against him. He folded his arms around her as his heart thudded against his ribs. “What more could I possibly want?” he whispered into her ear.
He closed his eyes as the answer burned in his mind. There was something missing. An extra, wondrous gift that would take his present joy and elevate it into something even greater. It was something he had always wanted, but as the months of their marriage passed by, a nugget of doubt had seeded into his heart. Maybe it would never happen.
Maybe he would never hold a child of his own in his arms.
Sorrow darted through him, but Guy clenched his teeth and chased the thought away. He had already been blessed with more than any man deserved. How could he ask for anything more?
Kitty was in his arms, his life was full of love and light. It was more than enough.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kitty waited forhim on the wide canopied bed that stood at the centre of their bedchamber. Flames danced in the fireplace, sending a rosy glow about the room which had been beautifully furnished with hand-carved cabinets made especially for Rossfarne Castle. So many nights she had spent safely cocooned in Guy’s strong embrace, but despite all of this, she was nervous.
Footsteps on the stone stairs indicated he was on his way. Kitty re-arranged her loose hair and leaned back on her elbows, aiming for nonchalance when she felt anything but.
He paused in the doorway, the narrow frame making his tall, muscular body appear even larger. A thrill of anticipation shot through her as his dark eyes raked over her white smock appreciatively. Their years together had done nothing to dull the magnetic pull of attraction between them.
His finely carved lips broke into a smile. “That’s the view I’ve been waiting for.”
He crossed the room in a bound and scooped her into his strong arms. Kitty’s body folded into the natural curves of her husband’s, but she turned her face away from his kiss, even as liquid desire pooled inside her. She must speak.
Guy’s breath was warm against her cheek. She leaned her forehead against his solid chest and breathed in his masculine fragrance. Leather, sea salt and the essential scent of herhusband. This was the man she loved. Why, then, was she so afraid?
His fingers splayed through her hair, a gesture of affection as well as longing. She nuzzled into his shoulders, suddenly desperate to prolong this period of not knowing. Alert to her mood, Guy changed the course of his hand, from skimming over her hip to cupping her face.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
His thumb caressed her cheek. “What is it?”
His palm was warm and comforting. Kitty took a deep breath. Once she had said the words, there would be no going back. Her throat tightened, and she could only shake her head.
A concerned frown flicked over his dark brow. “You can tell me anything, you know?”
For two wonderful years, her life had been full of love and laughter. They had fortune, favour with the king and family nearby. Aside from a couple of short spells when Guy returned to the battlefield and she feared for his safe return, their days passed by in comfort while nights were studded with bliss. Guy had walked out of the shadows. But did he want what she was about to give him?
How would he take the news?
Earlier in the day, surrounded by the chatter and laughter of wedding guests, she had been filled with confidence. But now, alone with her husband, her doubts had resurfaced like ghosts from the past.
“I have something to tell you.” She forced out the words, fixing her gaze over his shoulder so he wouldn’t see the worry in her eyes.
Guy held her steady against him for a moment, in which all she could hear was the rhythmic beating of his heart and the spluttering of logs on the fire. Then he gently pulled away until he could see her face.
“Tell me,” he repeated, an invitation, not an order.
“We have never spoken of it.” The flickering light from the flames cast his face alternately into planes of light and dark.
“And you have never spoken in riddles before tonight.”
She remembered the sorrowful tale of his younger brother. How his voice had broken in anguish as he relayed the harrowing events.“It was my job to protect him, and I failed. I never want to feel that pain again,”he had said.
It had been on the tip of her tongue to ask if that meant he did not wish for children, but their wedding day had been still ahead of them, and it had seemed pre-emptive. Then, for many months, there was no sign of pregnancy. She had thought it would not happen. Until now.
Guy pushed himself into an upright position and pulled her against him, holding her tight and safe inside the circle of his arms. His hands skimmed over the swell of her breasts to settle on her belly. His breath warmed the bare flesh of her shoulder as the hooting of an owl filtered through the half-open window.
“I can wait all night,” he said, teeth nibbling gently at her earlobe.
It would be the easiest thing in the world to turn her face to his, entwine her fingers into his thick hair and give him the deep, passionate kiss they both craved. But she must speak.
