Page 101 of Ghost
I once had a similar dream. So I could understand how he felt. But why the flirting? Did it make him feel as though he was closer to achieving it?
But he had rules. I had never seen a man look so lonely before.
“Does it make you feel better when you flirt with me?”
Damen’s eyes popped open, and his head snapped back a few inches. “What?”
“Flirting,” I repeated, recalling some of the more elaborate attempts. “The four of you do it, and I’ve been so confused. I thought you all might be testing me.”
Damen blinked before answering. “You could tell that I was flirting?”
Had he lost his mind? There was no way he thought he was discreet about it.
“Of course.” I raised my eyebrow. “It was totally obvious. But since you said you couldn’t date, I thought something else might be the cause…”
My words trailed off as Damen’s finger pressed against my lips. His eyes shone with an intensity that wasn’t there before. “I’ve been bad.” His lips quirked in a self-deprecating way. “I’m notsupposedto flirt with you. It has the potential of causing us to toe lines we shouldn’t cross. None of us are supposed to do it. And I do feel better knowing that I’m not the only one who can’t resist. But I can’t stop, even though I want to.”
He sighed, putting his head to my forehead again. “I don’t know what to do, baby girl. What should we do?”
This… This was too much. I didn’t understand how to help. But the pain in his voice, the longing and sadness, made me want to do whatever I could.
Was being with me hurting them?
“Do you want me to go away?” I offered, even though the thought caused my heart to break a little more with each word. “Would it be easier if you didn’t know me?”
“No!” Damen pulled me from the stool in a second, and I straddled him as he held me against his chest. His arms shook, as if he was afraid I’d disappear at any moment. “No, you can’t leave. I’m sorry, I’ll stop if it makes you uncomfortable. Just don’t leave.”
“It doesn’t make me uncomfortable…” I muttered, knowing my face was on fire. But if he was being honest, I had to be as well. “It makes me feel cute. But I don’t know what you want from me, or how to react. Especially since you all do it. That’s what makes me nervous.”
“You are cute. You’re beautiful, and sexy, and cute, and adorable,” Damen whispered in my hair. “Every time you blush, or react in any way, I want to see more of it. Even if I spent the rest of my life figuring this out, I’d be happy.”
It was official, my heart was in danger of beating out of my chest.
But what he was saying…
It sounded like he wanted a relationship. “You said you can’t date?”
“Damn,” Damen grumbled, almost petulantly. “I can’t date. Forget about it, this isn’t fair to you. You deserve to find happiness. I’ll get over it. But please let me stay your friend. Don’t leave us—”
He stopped mid-sentence. I had crawled out of his lap and moved to my knees in front of him, grabbing onto his shirt.
“Stop,” I begged, meeting his eyes. I couldn’t listen to him anymore. This wasn’t the confident Damen I had gotten to know, and I didn’t like that one bit. “I’ll be like you guys. Do what feels natural.”
Damen blinked at me. “What?”
“You can all… flirt with me if you want,” I told him, suddenly no longer able to meet his gaze. The boys were starved for female contact, something more than a fling. That much was obvious. They never had a female friend before. “If it makes you feel better about your situation. I understand.”
I didn’t need anything more than to be with them anyway. Besides, I couldn’t date Damen and not think of the others. I’d never do that. They were destined to fight supernatural crime as their own foursome. It would be simpler to keep our dysfunctional friendship as so.
“Bianca…” Damen started.
But I cut him off, staring at my fists as I rushed to get my main concern out of the way. “But if we’re going to remain friends, please don’t ask for anything… more either. I’m not interested in that kind of relationship.”
“Bianca…”
“And don’t let me know when you fulfill your biological needs elsewhere.” I stumbled through the words. “I’m giving you all permission to flirt with me, but I know hanging around me isn’t going to get your needs fulfilled. So I—”
“Bianca, stop.” Damen’s finger was against my mouth again, and my eyes shot from my hands to his face.
