Page 30 of Hidden
Damen’s mouth thinned and his gaze flicked to the side. When he looked back to me, it seemed that within that instant he had made up his mind about something. “You need to eat.”
This again. “You can’t make me.”
I expected him to argue, but instead, he kissed me again. This time the feeling of his mouth over mine was far more aggressive. And the passion that had been fading fanned into an inferno.
I was still annoyed at him for continuously trying to boss me around, but my reason was soon lost. The only thing that mattered was his weight pressing me into the mattress, and the way his hands moved over me. His kisses stirred feelings that were both wonderful and strange.
But then his hand moved down, and his fingers brushed over the fabric protecting my stomach. At first, it felt nice. The warmth of his hand against me was comforting. And the small movement caused my muscles to twitch under his touch.
Then, without warning or reason, the feeling vanished, and a familiar terror rose up instead. My blood turned to ice.
This was no longer enjoyable in any way, and I was suffocating.
“No.” My heart stuttered dangerously as my mouth tore from his. Blackness crept into the edges of my vision. It wasn’t Damen over me anymore. Instead, it washim. I couldn’t see from fear and pain, and my arms and legs felt heavy.
In some part of my mind, I knew it was Damen. But nothing made sense.
I was going to be sick.
He’d frozen in response to my word. He was saying something. But everything felt distant and unreal. My thoughts raced, and I tried to grasp on to anything that might keep me safe.
Then I remembered Julian and what he had said.
“Pineapple.” I was so grateful for his brilliant thinking. “Pineapple, pineapple, pineapple!”
The weight vanished, and Damen was gone.
Yet, even with the pressure gone, it felt like an eternity before my heart stopped thundering in my ears. The darkness took longer to fall away from my eyes, and when the panic had subsided, a hollow feeling was left in its place.
The room slowly returned to focus: the bright white ceiling, the plain walls. I was on the bed, alone, and my limbs felt weak as I finally moved to wipe my eyes with my shaking arms. My face and neck were wet, and I hadn’t even realized I’d been crying.
Then I remembered Damen, and his quietness caused me to forget about myself. I pulled myself up, searching.
He was on the other side of the room, his face in his hands as he sat in one of the chairs there. I’d never seen him so still. The line of strain radiating from him was almost palpable. There seemed to be a dark energy radiating from his general direction.
He was mad at me.
My pulse thrummed, because the last thing I wanted was to make him angry. And we had an agreement… “D-D-Damen?”
His head snapped up and his face was dark and unreadable as his gaze met mine. The expression faded, turning into concern. “Bianca.”
He was kneeling beside the bed within an instant. He started to reach for me but paused, his hand in midair. “Are you all right?” He seemed to regret his words the second he asked, and followed up with, “That’s a stupid question, of course…”
I wasn’t sure what to say.
Anything was bound to make me seem crazy. There was no rational explanation for my sudden freak-out, or at least, not something he’d understand. My stomach twisted as I wondered what might happen next.
There was no way I hadn’t ruined everything. Only moments before, he’d been furious.
But as he held my gaze, I realized he wasn’t expecting me to say anything at all. For once, he wasn’t going to press me. I wasn’t sure why, but I was beginning to suspect he didn’t think any less of me either.
“Do you mind if…” he began, glancing over my face. There was a slight hesitation to his voice as he continued. “Do you mind if I touch you right now, or hold you? Or would you rather be alone?”
I wasn’t sure what possessed me to do it, but I’d raised my arms before he’d even finished his sentence. Then he was on the bed, pulling me into his lap.
“Oh, baby.” He held me against him so tightly I might break. He roughly stroked my arm. “I’m so, so sorry.” His voice rumbled under my cheek.
Now that he was close to me, I could feel his shaking. It caused my chest to tighten. Even more than my own pain, I couldn’t stand hurting him. “I-i-it’s not your fault.” My voice wavered, and his hold grew even tighter. “I’ll be okay.” I fought to make my words stronger.
