And it was embarrassing. I’d been overwhelmed, and still hardly used to this world. With everyone watching, expecting something from me, I had no idea how to react.
“You’re scared,” he said, cupping my chin and rubbing his thumb over my cheek. “I get that. I was acting impulsively. But it was a bad move. Let me deal with this myself, and when I’m stronger, you won’t need to worry about a thing. You’ll be ready one day.”
It was hard to think under the weight of his attention. “But Idowant to.”
“You will.” Miles’s smile was almost sad. “I’ll take care of this part on my own. I’ll prove that it’s worth the risk.”
This part? What was that—what risk?
And why did it seem like Miles had made up an entire situation in his head and was acting it out all on his own?
Why couldn’t he just tell me what was wrong?
“Can I do something to help?”
“Nah.” Miles nudged me playfully. “Are you ready to go back?”
“In a minute,” I answered, biting my lip as I turned from him once more. “I just want to sit here for a while.”
“Sure.” He put his arm around me, hand at my waist, and pulled me closer to him. “We can do that.”
The camp was already halfway packed by the time Miles and I returned, and my dread returned with a vengeance.
Were we really leaving him?
But even if we were, what was wrong with me? I was a grown woman, and I’d survived without these boys all my life. Why, now, was I turning into this needything?
It was a physical sickness I felt, and I couldn’t imagine why. The contents of my stomach soured, and the brief peace—where everything that had fallen into place, if only for a moment—was shattered.
I couldn’t be like this; it wasn’t fair.
“How much longer do you think you’ll be?” Damen was speaking to Miles, who had returned to the dirt-filled firepit to pack up his few belongings.
“I’m not sure,” he was saying. “Should only be a few more days. With Titus gone, they’ll probably come back out.”
Julian finished securing the tent, and as Damen addressed Miles, he’d made his way to my side.
“Okay?” he asked, holding on to my hand.
I could only nod—this was not the time to be a baby.
“Which reminds me.” Damen crossed his arms. “Have you seen a dragon?”
Miles paused, still kneeling on the ground, and glanced at Damen curiously. “A… dragon?” he asked, slowly looking at Titus.
“Knock it off.” Titus had been leaning against a tree. He crossed the camp in four large strides, and poked his finger into Damen’s chest. “You know there’s no damn dragon.”
“Oh,” Miles said, realization lighting his features. “You mean the Snallygaster. No, I haven’t seen it.”
Titus gestured at Miles. “Obviously!”
“But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist,” Miles continued, smirking. “Dragons are sneaky and good at hiding. It might have a cave somewhere.”
“Oh, for the love of…” Titus grumbled, stalking away from the two of them. “I give up.”
“Bianca.” Julian pulled at my hand gently. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I blinked, black spots fading from the edge of my vision—I’d been gripping Julian’s hands so hard thatmineached.